


The Sun In Wintertime

by kyluxtrashcompactor, oorsprong



Series: The Sun In Wintertime [2]
Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015)
Genre: Alcohol, Anal Sex, Body Worship, Canon Setting, Cuddling & Snuggling, Falling In Love, First Dates, Fluff, Hand Feeding, Hand Jobs, Happy Ending, Kissing, Lingerie, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining, Oral Sex, Plotting, Rimming, Romance, Sleeping Together, Switching, all sex is safe in space, taking it slow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-08
Updated: 2017-04-26
Packaged: 2018-09-15 15:57:44
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 24,985
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9242984
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kyluxtrashcompactor/pseuds/kyluxtrashcompactor, https://archiveofourown.org/users/oorsprong/pseuds/oorsprong
Summary: Kylo had been on the verge of death when Hux  brought him back with a confession of love. Now, they must navigate their fledgling romance, learning to simply be together despite the weight of the universe on their shoulders.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This work continues where [Stay With Me, Ren](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7457608) left off.
> 
> Tags to be added as chapters are posted.

> _ "I'm not expecting to grow flowers in a desert, _
> 
> _ But I can live and breathe and see the sun in wintertime" _

  
\-------------------------

 

Even though it had been more than twenty-four hours since Ren had been released (of his own volition) from med bay, the antiseptic, sickly sweet smell of bacta still clings to his skin, a shroud to remind him of his near failure on the planet only just left behind in hyperspace. Ren’s propensity toward overly critical self-analysis, which has him examining over and over again how Hux came to be dragging  _ him _ into an abandoned shuttle for safety, wars with what had happened afterward. It actually seems more like a dream, an illusion of his fractured state while in the bacta tank, and even now, he’s not quite sure it was real. Hux. There is no way that Hux kissed him. Or professed such vulnerable feelings as love. Surely not for Ren.

 

He reaches Hux’s door, casts out with his senses just enough to feel the edge of the sharp blade of consciousness that is Hux. He pulls back, knowing Hux always feels him, and doesn’t always appreciate it. Ren reaches out and presses the call button beside the durasteel plates that separate them, even though he could wrench them apart with a thought. 

 

He waits.

 

When the door opens Hux turns to him with a look that he cannot decipher.  Though the general is off duty he wears his uniform.  It’s oddly relieving.  Though he has vague recollections of Hux hovering in the medbay, at no time after they returned to the ship did he ever let his appearance slip.  If everything else has somehow changed he has this constant to cling to.

 

“Ren,” Hux says after a moment.  A half-smile flits across his face before disappearing.  “I’m glad to see you up and about.  Please come in.”

 

He gestures vaguely with a gloved hand and Ren notices that though the quarters are not much larger than his own the sparse decor is aesthetically pleasing and the seats look comfortable.

 

“Sit with me a moment,” he adds, as though noticing Ren’s glance over at the small couch against one wall.  “I suppose you need to be briefed.”

 

_ So _ , Ren thinks,  _ it’s down to business _ . It had all been a dream after all.

 

He moves toward the seat Hux indicates and sinks into it, staring at his hands against the polished, spotless surface. He scratches his wrist, anxiety and bacta both making him itch. And cold. He is blasted cold all the time, and can’t seem to shake it. 

 

“Did we lose many?” he asks. His eyes flit to Hux, looking for some sign of disapproval or disappointment. Those things, Ren understands.

 

To his mild surprise Hux looks pleased.

 

“Thanks to you we managed to contain our losses after the initial strike.  After you were incapacitated we did suffer some losses but my men fought commendably.”

 

Hux seats himself next to Ren and leans forward as though imparting some secret.

 

“You did well.  You know that, don’t you?”

 

For one startling moment he lifts a hand and moves as though to place it over Ren’s but seems to think better of it and sets it on his own thigh instead.

 

“Before we get down to business though, I suppose we should address what happened.  Don’t you?”

 

There is a moment where the air between them is charged, like static between Hux’s hand and Ren’s, but then the universe seems to reorder itself, like Hux is wrenching its fabric back into place. Ren watches him with overmuch attention as Hux places his hand on his own knee, fingers bowed from pressing into his own flesh. They are like the fingers of memory, tugging at Ren, trying to pull him back to that hollowed out shuttle. For a moment, Ren can smell smoke on the air, and the copper tang of blood. 

 

He feels Hux watching him, waiting for a response.  _ We should discuss what happened. _

 

“Yes,” Ren says, thinking he means the mission he’d botched with his less than adequate intelligence prior. “I should not have been in a hurry. I was impatient. Next time I will meditate more deeply on what we face before you commit to action.” His voice sounds rote, mechanical, even to his own ears. Ren realizes it’s not much different than the tone he uses to speak to the Supreme Leader. 

 

The silence between them lingers just long enough that Ren begins to fidget and then Hux meets his eyes again.

 

“You don’t remember what happened after we took shelter together?”

 

His voice doesn’t exactly waver but there’s an air of uncertainty that undercuts his words.  As though he’s not quite sure he remembers himself.

 

Or maybe he’s pleading with Ren to remember because he doesn’t want to supply the details.

 

Ren cocks his head slightly. Hux is projecting the vision clearly between them now, and it startles Ren with its realism and attention to detail. He’s seeing himself through Hux’s eyes, blood-smeared and wild, and he feels the residual effects of that kiss on a surge of endorphins through his own system.

 

“You kissed me,” he says, voice full of wonder. It  _ was _ real. His hand twitches on the table, wanting to reach out and fist itself again in Hux’s uniform like he had that day, and tug him close, and recreate that moment.

 

“ _ You _ kissed  _ me _ ,” Hux corrects him.  But there’s nothing in his voice but relief.  The general folds his hands and then separates them as though he cannot figure out where to put them.  “Not that it was unwelcome.  I may have been a bit… verbose…  at the time.  But you were in such a state I thought--”

 

He frowns in a way that makes Ren suspect the memory causes him pain.

 

“I thought you were going to die.  So now you know.  When they whisked you away to the medbay I still thought somehow I might lose you and I was not myself.  While you were healing I had time to consider what passed between us and I do not regret or deny my actions.  I do not take my words back, Ren.  I simply need to know if time has given you a different perspective on what happened.”

 

Flooded with relief, Ren finds himself momentarily giddy. “You sound like you’re reading a report,” he teases, biting his lip against a smile that only Ben Solo had ever worn. The thought makes it slip, quickly. Before Hux can respond to that beyond the brief burst of  _ irritation _ in his feedback and the way his cheeks pink just slightly, Ren hurries on. “I don’t have an alternative perspective, no. Should I?”

 

“I’m giving you an out, Ren.  Don’t you understand?”

 

Without warning the general reaches out and places his hand over Ren’s.  Though the soft leather of the glove prevents any real connection the touch electrifies him just the same.

 

“I don’t know how to do whatever it is that needs to be done now.  And I don’t know if this admission will burden you or distract you from your duties to the Supreme Leader.  Perhaps you deserve someone force-adept like yourself.  Or perhaps you think better of your actions in the light of reflection.  It would still be possible to continue our working relationship as though this never occurred.”

 

Hux removes his hand from Ren’s, reluctance plain on his face.

 

“I suppose it is rather selfish of me but I have thought of little besides touching you again to bring myself comfort.”

 

His gaze drops at the admission.

 

Ren chases Hux’s hand with his own when the general tries to pull it away, but he stops with his own hand still resting on the corner of the table while Hux’s returns to his lap. Ren is still muddle-minded from the half-sleep of the bacta tank, and Hux’s words are so unexpected, so full of  _ foreign _ concepts, that he can barely process them.

 

“Hux…” he says. “I don’t want out. I don’t want another … I don’t want it not to have occurred.” He wants to comfort Hux, sensing his discomfort clearly man to man, without the aid of the Force. It shows on Hux’s face, is outlined in the stiff set of his shoulders. “I should meditate,” he adds, meaning that he needs to reorder his scattered thoughts and make a place in them for Hux, and only Hux. A secret place, hidden from his Master, who does not tolerate the attachments of Kylo Ren’s basest self. 

 

Hux only nods, an audible swallow clicking in his throat before he casts a softer look in Ren’s direction.  He removes his gloves and places them neatly on the table before them, revealing slender fingers, pale in the harsh cabin light.

 

“People do this, don’t they?  We can do this…”  He sounds almost angry at himself as he reaches for Ren’s hand again.  This time the heat from his palm sends a jolt of pleasure through Ren’s body, as though this connection of the flesh has recharged him in a way he didn’t know he needed.  Hux squeezes a little and lets his eyes shut for a moment.

 

_ We can do this _ . Ren wonders what Hux means. Hold hands? Forge some form of human connection that offers comfort to them both? Kylo Ren has no real experience with that, and he doesn’t allow himself to focus on the memories of Ben Solo. He leaves his hand in Hux’s grip, curling his own fingers over Hux’s cool, dry palm. Ren’s heartbeat is loud in his own ears, and he feels that he should say something, but he doesn’t know what. 

 

Then Hux withdraws his hand, almost abruptly, and with a sigh, it’s back to business, delivering the mundane briefing that Ren only half hears.  When he leaves Hux’s quarters later that evening the General looks as though he wants to say something more than “Goodnight,” but silence accompanies Ren as he heads for the door.

\-------------------------

  
  


Even for officers of noteworthy rank the luxuries are scarce.  They’re at war, after all.  And Hux prefers not to set himself too far above those he commands.  So it’s with some hesitation that he procures a few delicacies for the otherwise simple meal he’s invited Ren to share with him.  

 

They haven’t spoken much since the briefing.  Hux doesn’t know if this state of affairs is normal or not-- with Ren who can tell?   Nor does he have any idea how to tread on this new landscape before him.  He knows what he wants in the immediate-- someone to comfort and confide in and to offer the same in exchange.  Sex would also be agreeable, to put it mildly.  Lately it’s on his mind all the time.  It’s the getting there that daunts him.

 

He puts aside his uniform for one of the two civilian outfits he owns.  It’s a bit old fashioned but the tunic and trousers are made of high quality fabric and edged with a bit of silver that shimmers in the dim lighting.  His father would have called it frivolous.  In secret he thinks the muted blues and cream colored accents in the tunic do more for his features than the polished black of military dress.

 

Two place settings adorn the compact table.  He won’t quite admit to himself that he purchased the set in hopes of having some time alone with Ren, even before the battle that brought them together.  For a moment he considers putting on some music but quashes the impulse with a flush of embarrassment.  It would be too much-- too cloying and sentimental.  The food is ready to eat when Ren arrives and Hux ushers him while trying to keep his expression neutral.  If by some grace the knight doesn’t notice his trembling fingers surely his heartbeat is too loud to escape detection.

 

Ren had been given few details about what Hux had in mind for the evening, and both had been delivered in the form of decrees.  _ Wear something casual _ and  _ don’t eat beforehand. _ Ren had imagined any number of things, but an intimate dinner, just the two of them, had not been among his considerations. Even now, some nondescript crew member is putting the final touches on the serving before shuffling out of the room, not meeting Ren’s eyes.  

 

Ren is less interested in the food than he is in Hux’s version of “something casual.” He’s never seen the habitually severe general out of his uniform, and he’s quite frankly mesmerized by the transformation. The soft blue fabric of his tunic accentuates the narrow shoulders so often hidden beneath his greatcoat, open at the throat to expose a fine sweep of collarbone. The way Hux’s hair is free from its typical styling product makes him look years younger, and coupled with his momentarily irresolute expression, he’s quite the alluring Academy cadet. Except he’s not wearing shoes. Ren can’t help being immediately distracted by how curiously perfect his feet are.

 

“Thank you for being prompt,” Hux offers, frowning a little at the way Ren stares at his bare feet.  He prefers to be comfortable in his quarters.  If the knight doesn’t like that he’ll simply have to get used to it.  “Dinner is on the table.  I hope you like Brualki brisket.  I suppose you may have dined on it before.”

 

He internally curses himself for the assumption.  Though popular on Coruscant, the dish is rare enough outside the core worlds and drawing such attention to Kylo Ren’s upbringing might be the evening’s biggest misstep, shutting down any trust between them.  He winces at the mistake and then pulls out a chair for Ren.

 

“Please,” he says, asking him to sit but also, in some small way, for forgiveness.

 

Ren sees the momentary discomfort that flits across Hux’s features when he alludes to Ren’s past. Ren is truthfully too distracted by this unexpected experience to pursue any indignation, and so he takes the proffered seat. Hux sinks down into the chair across from him and busies himself with pouring from a bottle of wine, resolutely not looking at Ren, who stares openly at him. 

 

“Did you have something you wanted to discuss?” Ren asks in a cautious tone, thinking perhaps this is some attempt at celebrating a promotion or an advance in their cause that Ren has yet to be made aware of. 

 

Hux hands the glass of wine to Ren and then pours for himself, shaking his head.

 

“Not particularly.  I just wanted your company.  Do you think I get out of uniform for just anyone?”

 

He ducks his head a little and lets out of a huff of a laugh, realizing what he’s just said.  “I mean this… ritual… is important, isn’t it?  Human psychology demands it.  But I enjoy it too.”

 

The wine is sharp and refreshing on his tongue as he takes a sip, congratulating himself on securing such a pleasant vintage.

 

“I suppose this is a good way to show you that I can, erm, take care of you.”

 

He uses the serving fork to slide a slice of the brisket onto Ren’s plate and then serves himself, cutting the meat as he waits for Ren’s response.

 

Ren’s focus is immediately on the suggestion that Hux can  _ take care of him _ . He brings his own glass of wine close to his lips, glances into it in delayed recognition, and almost sets it aside, for he only very rarely indulges in such a manner. When he catches Hux’s eyes, a shade of blue-green now, looking hopefully at him, he decides that perhaps this is the right moment to allow such a potentially dangerous luxury.  

 

Ren takes a sip, finding it crisp and just a touch sweet. “So this is a ritual, then, among your kind?” The corner of Ren’s mouth turns up, trying to indicate that he’s making an attempt at humor. Though he’s curious, too.

 

Hux can’t keep a startled look off his face at the question.

 

“Ren, has no one ever...” he wants to say ‘taken you out on a date’ and then realizes how absurd the concept must be to someone who has spent his entire life-- or what Hux knows of it anyway-- learning the ways of the force or whatever it is the Supreme Leader sees fit to instruct his apprentice in.

 

Placing his cutlery on the table he reaches across to take Ren’s hand, emboldened by the knight’s shy smile.

 

“Yes, this is a very important ritual among my kind.  Treating a loved one to a meal is customary.  I want you to enjoy yourself.”

 

Ren’s belly feels tight at that, fluttery in an upside down sort of way that makes him shift in his chair. He suddenly realizes what this is, though he’s forced to think back to his childhood to dredge an example to the surface of Han and Leia leaving him at home with a droid while they went out to dinner. It’s not the sort of experience that Ren has ever had, or ever thought to. 

 

He has no idea what to do, so he merely mimics Hux. The food is good, so enjoying it isn’t an element he must pretend to, and he realizes after the first few minutes that Hux must be rather nervous, for when matching Hux sip for sip with the wine, Ren finds himself beginning to get a bit intoxicated. He finds it’s actually rather pleasant.

 

“You look nice,” Ren tells him, thinking maybe he should have said so earlier.  

 

Hux lets a genuine smile slip past.  “So do you.  Although…”  On impulse he leans in and dabs a spot of gravy from Ren’s upper lip with his napkin.  He places it back in his lap and continues eating, trying not to think about how sweet the knight's lips would taste, gravy-stained or no, and flushing a little at the way Ren’s eyes widen at the gesture.

 

“I find this very agreeable, don’t you?  It’s not often I have company.  We should make a habit of it.  I can set aside an evening a week to dine with you in private.  Would that satisfy you?”  Another sip of wine fortifies him to meet Ren’s eyes again.

 

“I…” Ren begins, meaning to remark on his rigid schedule of training and meditation, but decides against it. “Yes. That would be nice. I would like that.” He drains his wine glass, moves to set it on the table, but props it against the edge of his plate in his flustered distraction. It tips over, then stops, suspended diagonally mid-fall. Ren plucks it out of the air, sets it down carefully. 

 

“Sorry,” he murmurs, thinking he’s most likely in the process of making a fool out of himself.  

 

Resting his chin in his hands Hux grins at the sight.  He’s a little tipsy but that’s alright.

 

“Charming trick,” he says of Ren’s close call with the wine glass.  “I wouldn’t mind seeing what else you can do when you put your mind to it.”

 

Their eyes meet and Hux blinks slowly, feeling warm all over and not at all like himself.  The pass is clumsy but genuine though in his heart he knows that nothing will come of it.  They’ve had a little too much to drink and he wants to be clear-headed when-- if--  _ when _ \-- they come to it.

 

To distract himself he clears the plates from the table and sets them aside.  A droid will attend to cleaning and replacing them in his cabinet later.  As he takes his seat again he reaches for Ren’s hand, brings it to his mouth, and brushes his lips over rough knuckles.  

  
“We should probably call it a night.”

 

Ren isn’t sure he wants to call it a night, and would much rather have Hux’s lips on his. He turns the hand in Hux’s fingers, pulls them up toward his mouth, and kisses them. Ren touches the tip of his tongue to one, then catches it for just a short second between his teeth while watching Hux’s eyes grow instantly dark. “Is that an invitation to stay?”

 

With a bittersweet sigh Hux shakes his head.

 

“Much as I would like to spend more time with you I’m afraid these reports cannot wait.  If I’d known…  I only mean, if I’d thought ahead I might have cleared my schedule.”  He should have done exactly that.  He still could, regulations be damned.  But he cannot afford to rush this new thing budding between them.

 

“Rest assured our future meetings will not be so constrained by my duties.  I’m willing to offer you my time in any capacity you require.”

 

Taking his hand back he gets up from his chair, braces himself on the table for a moment and loses the fight with the urge welling up inside him.  It’s nothing at all to step over to where Ren now stands and close the distance between them.

 

“Until next time.”

 

Feeling oddly clumsy he places a tentative palm against Ren’s chest and leans in until their lips are nearly touching, asking Ren to close the gap between them with his eyes.

 

Ren’s arm slips around Hux’s waist and tugs him close, his other hand cupping the back of the general’s head as he presses their lips together. Hux’s lips are warm, a bit dry, tasting of wine, and his hair is achingly soft. None of this feels real. Perhaps Ren really did die on that planet, and this is his after-life. 

 

He touches his tongue to Hux’s bottom lip, wanting him to open for him, wanting Hux to tell him to stay. 

 

Ignited by the brief kiss Hux weakens a little and then leans in with a soft chuckle to bump their foreheads together.

 

“I can’t, Ren…”   _ I want to. _  He leaves the thought unspoken, flooding with pleasure as he brushes the tip of his nose against Ren’s.  “I don’t want to rush this.  Please,” he murmurs against the knight’s lips.

 

Ren blinks, swallowing. He’s reeling a bit at Hux’s feedback, which is like banked fire, full of potential, but tamed with the sort of self-control that Ren admires above all else. He offers Hux another soft kiss, holding his fervor in check because Hux had asked it of him. 

 

“As you wish, General,” Ren says, brushing his thumb over Hux’s lips. He turns to leave, because he does not trust himself to stay longer.

  
The moment Ren slips out the door Hux permits himself to sink into a chair in quiet relief.  He brings a hand to his mouth to touch the warmth there and closes his eyes, already anticipating their next encounter.


	2. Chapter 2

A mysterious item arrives at Kylo Ren’s quarters the next morning, brought by a stormtrooper who seems slightly nervous but pleased to offer it to him.  There is a horticulture specialist on board who has a small team to assist in an ongoing project to develop better mobile greenhouses for the production of raw materials.  This isn’t a military priority but Hux supports such innovation.  And Ren can tell it pleases him to have new projects under his command.

 

The flower comes in a miniature greenhouse of its own and Ren is startled to see the telltale black petals of a Murakami orchid peeking out beneath the protective covering of the nutrient mask.  He pulls it aside to find the rare flower in full bloom.  

 

“The only one to have survived the cloning process, Sir,” the trooper says with no small amount of pride.  A note attached to the base of the small housing structure: _Armitage_ , hand-written in ink.

 

Ren stands for a long moment in the doorway, merely holding the plant with the note pinched between two fingers. He considers the sparse, virtually negligible detail of the message, and wonders what, exactly, Hux intends with this delivery. Has Ren missed some report or memo that indicates Hux would like him to study the plant? It doesn’t escape Ren’s understanding that the Murakami orchid is Force sensitive flower, exceedingly rare; might it have a function for military or intelligence endeavors?

 

The stormtrooper still facing him in the hall clears his throat boldly, snapping Ren out of his musings.

 

“Sir?”

 

“Mm,” Ren grunts. “You may go.”

 

The trooper salutes smartly, but Ren turns away before the gesture resolves, and the door snicks shut between them. Crossing the room to his single table, Ren sets the plant down on the glossy black surface and continues to regard it. Slowly, as though sensing some latent impression of Hux’s intentions through the plant itself, Ren begins to wonder if this is not a utilitarian delivery at all.

 

Has Hux actually sent him a _gift_?

 

\-------------------------

 

In the week since their first formal date Hux has spent an irritating amount of time trying to figure out if he’s made a mistake.  Ren hasn’t mentioned the flower at all, though he seemed eager enough to get down to business where sex was concerned.  It occurs to him that Ren may not understand the difference between a hasty liaison for mutual satisfaction and a genuine relationship.  Hux isn’t particular sure he understand it himself but he knows that tokens of affection are often exchanged between paramours to foster the latter.  What he doesn’t know is whether to be more disheartened that Ren doesn’t care to return the sentiment or angry at himself for investing so much in the first place.

 

But then, where would Snoke’s apprentice learn a thing like that?

 

The invitation to his quarters to watch the grav-ball match broadcast from Coronet is as low key as Hux can make it.  For all he knows Ren doesn’t even enjoy sports.  Hux has a few fond memories of playing grav-ball as a cadet.  Never by Corellian rules, of course, but that will only make this match more interesting.

 

In a pair of casual slacks and one of the form-fitting undershirts that he tends to wear beneath the uniform he will intimidate no one, but he hopes the less refined dress might make Ren feel comfortable.  If the evening goes well they may be able to branch more serious topics-- the logistics of their tentative relationship is foremost on Hux’s mind.  Even standing side by side on the bridge makes Hux feel a bit unsure of himself.  As though he’s keeping a secret.  If it were up to Hux the situation would be clear, known, and unremarkable.  A general has no use for sneaking around and he’s surely discreet enough to maintain a romantic relationship with Kylo Ren in such a way that no one thinks to pry.

 

How Ren feels about this is another matter.  

 

When the knight arrives at the door Hux greets him with a nod and invites him inside and to remove his boots if he cares to.

 

Ren toes his boots off by the door, arranging them neatly because he knows Hux will appreciate it. He watches Hux out of the corner of his eye as he does so, seeing that the general hovers nearby regarding him in turn. The holo-projector is broadcasting over Hux’s shoulder, camera panning a boisterous, multi-hued crowd, the sound of exultant cheering muted. It doesn’t surprise him that Hux is a fan of such a pastime; he imagines the general is quite athletic, and Ren knows him to be exceedingly quick. Nimble, perhaps. He’s absolutely imagined that recently, and all the ways it might manifest beneath his hands.

 

Ren has grown increasingly unsure over the past week what it is that Hux seems to be stalling about; it seemed clear between them during their last personal encounter that Ren was interested in Hux’s overtures, willing. Is this some form of class behavior, particular to aristocracy? Some form of power game?

 

As Ren straightens again from arranging his boots, he examines Hux’s expression with narrowed eyes, refraining, but just barely, from casting out to simply take his answers. There is no duplicity written upon Hux’s pale features, however, and Ren knows the general well enough to recognize it. Hux is a practiced liar, and when he wishes to omit truths or turn a situation to his advantage with carefully tailored information, he does so with no inflection and a countenance like stone. Just now, Hux’s eyes are open, softly round behind near-translucent lashes. He’s chewing the inside of his bottom lip, and can’t seem to decide where to put his hands. He settles for tucking them beneath his arms.

 

“Thank you for coming.  Please have a seat. I wasn’t sure if this was something you might enjoy,” Hux adds hastily, feeling foolish for not bringing it up in conversation before.  But Ren is here.  That must count for something.

 

“Did you receive the orchid I sent?” he asks in a quieter voice.

 

Ren takes a single step closer, watches Hux sway back slightly in habit but stand his ground. Absolutely nothing captivates Ren more than the fact that Hux is entirely unafraid of him.

 

“I did,” Ren answers in a matching pitch. Hux opens his mouth to say something else, but Ren leans in and captures his lips quickly. Ren pulls back just enough to test his theory that the orchid was, in fact, a gift. “Thank you.”

 

Warmth blooms in his lips, his fingers, the pit of stomach as Hux leans into the kiss.  He steadies himself with his hands on Ren’s shoulders as they break apart.

 

“I’m glad,” he murmurs, leaning in to peck at the knight’s cheek before taking his hand and guiding him to the couch.  Apprehension melts away at the small gesture.  Ren is here and the world is right again.  The gift has been duly noted and appreciated.  He keeps ahold of the fingers curling against his own after they’re seated-- a reminder of the way they clasped hands after being rescued.  So easy to say the things on his mind in those crucial moments.  Why is it so difficult now?

 

They sit holding hands in awkward silence as the game continues.  Hux explaining the rules whenever he thinks Ren might not be following.  

 

Ren tries to follow the game, though his attention continues to wander. He keeps his eyes dutifully trained on the display, not wishing for Hux to think he’s disinterested, but he’s far more invested in tracing the delicate bones of Hux’s wrist with his thumb. In listening not to the myriad rules, but to the relaxed, human tone of Hux’s voice.

 

There is an interlude in the game which Hux explains is half-time, during which he offers Ren refreshments. Though Ren isn’t hungry, he accepts, just because Hux seems to thrive on imposing a sense of order on their interactions. When Hux returns from his small kitchenette, he brings a bowl of crisps and a dark, fizzy drink with ice that makes Ren sneeze upon tasting it.

 

Hux grins despite himself at the frank and utterly human reaction.  He tucks it away, not wanting Ren to think he’s being ridiculed and takes a sip of his drink instead.  On the holo the game picks up speed but he barely notices in the midst of the tension between them.

 

Turning to gaze at Ren comes naturally enough.  The knight is lovely in profile, generous lips slightly pursed as he watches numbers scroll along the feed.  He could lean in for another kiss and damn the holo and the couch is large enough to lie full length on…

 

His hand finds Ren’s again.  

 

Ren squeezes Hux’s hand, but lets go of it afterward in favor of leaning into the general’s smaller frame and sliding his own hand down Hux’s thigh. Those thighs would fit perfectly over his lap, Hux’s skin would be warm beneath Ren’s hands.

 

Turning his head, Ren brushes his lips against Hux’s jaw, just below his ear. Shifts up to take Hux’s earlobe between his teeth, flick his tongue across it.

 

“Kylo,” Hux whispers before succumbing to the sensation.  When he’s pulled into the knight’s lap he doesn’t protest.  A groan escapes his lips before they’re covered by Ren’s and then it’s a struggle to regain his bearings.

 

“Wait,” he gasps, coming up for air and winding his fingers in the black locks framing a startled face.  “Ren is this… is this all you want from me?”

 

Ren’s brow furrows, and he searches Hux’s face. “What do you mean?” Ren thinks he understands, but wishes to be sure.

 

“If you’re looking for maintenance sex I’m sure there’s no shortage of takers.  I need a steady partner.  Are you so eager to consummate this that you aren’t concerned about the risks of rushing into it?”

 

Hux pulls back a little and casts about for a place to rest his gaze.  Ren looms so close that he’s afraid if he meets those eyes again he’ll lose his conviction.

 

“Can’t you feel how badly I want you?  Don’t you trust me to take care of you the way you deserve?  Cherished and not used as an outlet?”

 

It is in the vein of response that Ren expected, but hearing it put in such a way startles him. The words _take care of you_ and _cherished_ resonate in skull, sharing echoes with their counterparts: _not deserving, worthless_.

 

Ren tucks his face into Hux’s neck, all the lust funneled away. “I trust you,” he says quietly, rubbing his nose against the general’s collarbone. Ren’s hands hover at the small of Hux’s back, unsure, fearing some rebuke or expression of disappointment.

 

That small connection coupled with Ren’s sudden deference encourages Hux to draw his knight into a protective embrace.

 

“Then trust me to court you in my own time.  Let me treat you like the prince you are to me.  Things will happen as they are meant to.  You might not know this but arranged marriages are still the fashion of the people I came from.  Giving in to base instinct is for a quick affair-- easily stoked and easily snuffed out.  But a strong foundation is built slowly to weather all storms.  Do you understand?”

 

He leans in to press a kiss to Ren’s forehead.  “I want to build a life with you.”

 

Ren’s face feels hot. He moves his lips to Hux’s neck again, stops himself. Leaning back, he looks into Hux eyes, which are clear and earnest and so achingly green. “Is that a marriage proposal then?” he deflects, trying on a smirk, though it doesn’t quite fit.

 

“Ah, no,” Hux assures him gently.  “But my intent is just as serious.  Watch the match with me.  Enjoy yourself.”  He leans in again as though to impart a secret. “We can still be intimate.  There’s something I enjoy that I haven’t quite worked up the courage to ask you for.”

 

With a coy smile he settles back with his feet in Ren’s lap and turns back to the viewscreen.

 

Ren sits there with Hux’s feet (his gorgeous, perfect feet with their perfect toes), and wonders if Hux’s secret fantasy is to simply have them in his lap. It’s curious, but Ren doesn’t have much to judge others’ fantasies by. He can barely articulate his own, so far down in the dark does he keep them.

 

Ren slides his hand down Hux’s shin, down to his foot, and squeezes it gently.

 

Hux writhes, makes a delicious purring noise, and Ren turns his head in surprise just in time to see his eyelashes flutter. The foot in his hand flexes, asking for more, and Ren finally understands.

 

With his eyes closed Hux is free to focus on the blissful sensation of Ren exploring his feet.  It’s not a shameful secret exactly, but it’s not something he’s ever revealed to anyone before.  Being massaged and pampered this way by the knight is something he’s only fantasized about.  Now, as deft fingers slip between his toes and rub his soles he can’t remember what his apprehension was in the first place.  All that matters is that Ren seems to be enjoying it too.  When a persistent forefinger tickles the pad of one foot he curls it and offers Ren a playful, half-hearted shove with the other.

 

“Behave,” he warns, knowing full well from the grin he receives in return that Ren won’t and loving him all the more for it.

 

By the time the match ends Hux is drifting to sleep on the sofa with Ren’s hand loosely encircling his ankle.  It’s pleasant-- exactly the sort of evening to spend with a partner before an early morning on duty.

 

Ren watches Hux drowse, admiring the way his eyelashes rest on his cheeks, the way his lips are slightly parted and his hair loose. The air of vulnerability makes Ren’s chest ache, and he feels himself being pulled along a path that he cannot see all ends to.

 

Ren shifts, moving to lay down beside Hux, who rolls over toward the edge of the couch so that Ren can fit behind him. Pulling Hux into his arms, sighing, Ren lays his head against Hux’s.

 

“What will Supreme Leader say of this?”

 

“I expect the Supreme Leader will be pleased that we aren’t at each other’s throats,” he says, taking the hand that Ren slips around him and pressing it to his chest.  “You’re an adult.  Surely you have leave to give your affection to whom you wish.”

 

He phrases the last as a statement but it’s a question and one he’d hoped not to have to ask.  Ren’s choices are his own.  He’d chosen to begin this path with Hux.  What should Snoke have to say about anything so long as the Order came first?

 

Ren ponders this, twining his fingers with Hux’s. “I believe that he will not object so long as you don’t defect to the resistance.”

 

The laugh that tumbles out of him must startle the knight who shifts a little before clutching him more tightly.

 

“What a thought.”  He turns in Ren’s arms and kisses the bridge of his nose.  “We are going to win this war, Ren.  And when we’ve obliterated our enemies together we’ll have cause to celebrate.  To rest.  I once looked forward to peace in the galaxy but there will be none for me unless you’re at my side.  We could be unstoppable.”

 

Ren strokes a hand through Hux’s hair, making runnels through it. It trickles slowly back into place over Hux’s forehead. “I have never thought I would have peace.” He runs a thumb over Hux’s lips. “Do I deserve such a reward after the things I’ve done?” Ren cups Hux’s chin, indicating with the gesture what he is implying would be the reward.

  
“You’ve given me hope again.”  Hux punctuates the statement with a slow kiss, savoring plush lips and allowing the knight to hook a leg around him as they press against one another.  “When I take you to bed,” he whispers against Ren’s cheek, “you’ll have your fill of what you deserve.  Don’t ever doubt your worth.  Not to me; not to anyone.”


	3. Chapter 3

It’s 1400 hours, the end of the alpha shift, and Ren has been waiting in the observation lounge on the E-deck officer’s suite for a half hour. This section of the ship is mostly unused during regular operations, as Hux likes to keep it reserved for meeting with any potential allies or liaisons to the First Order. That, and he is just grandiose enough to unofficially reserve the best observation gallery on the ship for himself. Ren knows that he comes here to unwind, to process his day, and to watch the stars; it refuels his creative energy.

 

Ren is edgy, and has been increasingly so as the week has passed since spending the evening in Hux’s quarters. At first, he attributed it to not getting enough exercise, so he’d begun spending more time at the gym, running laps and training with bokken. When that yielded no relief, Ren supposed that this protracted affair with Hux has fanned other natural urges too high, and so he sought release in the shower each morning. And yet he still finds himself vibrating with something barely repressed each time he sweeps onto the bridge. At one point, Hux’s cool demeanor, betraying nothing of his feelings beneath, had no effect on Ren, but it has gradually become maddening to the point that Ren actually left the command center this afternoon before he snatched Hux and demanded his undivided attention, right there in front of his entire crew.

 

Sitting here in this gallery, watching and listening to the traffic of the Yurak-Quanta II, a First Order controlled space station at the edge of the Outer Rim, Ren finally realizes what’s been plaguing him.

 

 _He misses Hux_.

 

He misses the heady, addictive feeling of Hux belonging only to him, of seeing only his own reflection in those green eyes. And he realizes he’s been waiting for Hux to extend some invitation, to give Ren permission to cross the boundary of co-commander and lover. But Ren is impatient, and not always inclined to rise above it, thus he sent a communication to Hux a half hour before inviting him here with a plan of his own.

 

Hux arrives at the end of his shift, still in uniform and preoccupied with the day’s events.   At the sight of Ren’s solemn figure robed and masked and waiting just for him in his favorite place on the ship he breaks into a smile.

 

“I came as soon as I could.  The view is really quite spectacular, isn’t it?  I’m glad you chose this particular spot.”  His approach is casual but careful.  It wouldn’t do to get too familiar while both are still dressed for duty.  He steps up beside Ren and clasps his hand behind his back as he takes in the star field yawning before them.

 

Ren cannot help but feel a spark of irritation at Hux’s regulation posture, hands carefully tucked away instead of touching him. Swallowing it down, Ren reaches up and unlatches his helm, setting it aside on one of the tall round tables. There is a bar in this room as well, with a droid currently in sleep mode; Ren is admittedly so covetous of Hux’s company at the moment that he doesn’t even want to wake the thing to offer Hux a drink.

 

Whether Hux will approve or not, Ren reaches for him, slides his hand over the smooth, well-pressed uniform, curls his fingers around the curve of Hux’s svelte waist, and pulls the General toward him. Gently enough that Hux can twist away, if he wants.

 

“Ren,” Hux admonishes, placing a palm on the back of the knight’s hand.  “It might be better to discuss certain aspects of our courtship before engaging in a public display like this.”  He hopes his gentle tone will not discourage such advances in private but running a warship comes with it’s own complicated rules of fraternization and it will not do to risk exposure before they’ve decided how to proceed.

 

Ren doesn’t let go immediately, though he hesitates, not wanting to upset Hux. Several things go through his mind, none of them pleasant, regarding what Hux wishes to _discuss_. Does he want this to be a secret? Is he ashamed of Ren? That thought is the loudest.

 

“There is no one nearby,” he tells Hux. “What do you want to discuss?”

 

“This isn’t the place,” Hux says, but the obstinate set of Ren’s jaw softens his response.  “I had hoped we would be able to come to an understanding about the image we present to the crew.  Are you comfortable with the crew being aware of the nature of our relationship?  Or do you feel the need to keep this as private as possible.  It’s difficult but it can be done if your service to Leader Snoke requires it.  I can’t read your mind, Ren.  You have to tell me these things.”  

 

“What the crew thinks of you and me or our relationship is of no concern to me,” Ren says, leaning in to take Hux’s lips in a kiss, though he stops himself. Dropping his hand from Hux’s waist, releasing him, he takes a step away and mimics Hux’s military posture, heaving a deep sigh. He stares out the viewport, feeling like his plan for this afternoon has failed before it even began.

 

“Must you be so short-sighted, Ren?  This isn’t about what the crew thinks of us.  I could care less what they think as long as they perform to standard.  This is about whether or not we may relax in one another’s company, whether I can hope to attend a formal event on your arm.  We could have that.  No rule forbids it.”

 

He turns to the knight with a searching look.  “Would it make you happier to compartmentalize this fully?”

 

Ren glares at him. “You’re calling me short sighted? Truly?”

 

“Listen to me,” Hux tries again, irritated that his partner cannot see the logic in what he’s proposing.  “I’m not your enemy.  But I don’t know how you envision this unfolding.  If we need to lay out some ground rules I’m at your disposal.  Tell me what you want, Ren.”

 

Ren reaches out again and takes Hux by his upper arm, and pulls him close, wrapping his arms around him from behind before he can object. “I want you right here, and I want you to quit being stubborn for just a minute,” Ren growls softly into Hux’s ear.

 

 _“Me_ being stubborn?” he’s torn between laughing and pushing Ren away.  Perhaps both.  “You’re absurd.  You want to have this conversation?  We’re having it.  But I don’t know what you want from me right now.”  He lets the irritation creep into his voice but stays put.

 

Ren holds Hux stiffly for a few moments, half expecting him to peel away from his embrace. When he doesn’t, Ren relaxes slowly, resting his cheek against the side of Hux’s head and exhaling. He feels a week’s worth of tension start to ebb now that he has Hux in his arms.

 

“This is better,” Ren tells him. “I needed this.”

 

After a moment of silence Hux asks, “Am I not intimate with you often enough?  Have I been neglecting you?”  Even as he hears the words a pang of regret rises up in him.  Ren’s moods are difficult to predict but perhaps he should be doing more to meet him halfway.

 

“You haven’t done anything wrong,” Ren sighs, shifting a hand to smooth his knuckles along the curve of Hux’s jaw, brushing the pale skin just above the collar of his uniform, which Ren is wrinkling, holding him this way. “But more of this would be nice, yes. I get ...  frustrated, having to watch you on the bridge, unable to touch you.”

 

“It’s part of the job, Ren.  We don’t have leave to relax around one another on duty.  But since you’re unconcerned with the crew’s perception I will formalize our relationship in the records.”  He reaches up to pat the knight’s hand.  “And I have something for you.”

 

He slips his fingers into one of the discretely tailored pockets in his uniform trousers and pulls out a small note, passing it awkwardly back into Ren’s half-closed hand.  Closing his eyes at the mild twinge of embarrassment at Ren reading the note here in front of him, he focuses on the words the knight is undoubtedly scrutinizing.

 

 

> _Will you do me the honor of accompanying me on a week of shore leave.  I've been presumptuous and rented a suite for two on the Yurak resort moon.  The accomodations are some of the finest in this sector and I hope my prince will find them fitting._
> 
> _I eagerly await your reply._
> 
> _Yours in devotion,_
> 
> _Armitage_
> 
>  

Ren feels a warm flush spread across his cheeks, and he spirits the note away into the folds of his robes. He had been mocked as a child, training at his uncle’s school, called a spoiled prince when he was frustrated with his lack of progress. He’s never heard the word used as an endearment, and isn’t sure what to think of it.

 

“You’ll formalize our relationship in the records?” he says instead, his tone teasingly gentle.

 

“Standard practice in order to avoid any complications that arise from illicit fraternization.  Besides, I don’t like the idea of anyone having designs on you because they’re unaware that you belong to me already.”  He turns in Ren’s arms, presses the softest kiss just under his chin for the pleasure of hearing the faint click of his throat as it swallows a responding groan.

 

“Now, did you call me here for some pressing reason or should we retire to my quarters?”

 

Ren’s hands slide across the smooth planes of Hux’s back, stopping just short of cupping his ass, which he’s fairly sure his general won’t tolerate. The reason he brought Hux here is difficult to grasp with his body pressed so close, Hux’s warm breath against his throat. Ren hadn’t expected to find that the suggestion that he _belongs_ to Hux to be so appealing or so terribly arousing, but it is.

 

“I did want to show you something,” Ren admits in a voice raspy with desire. “But your quarters sound good, too.”

 

Hux leads the way, letting Ren hang behind him a little.  Were he not in uniform he would gladly go arm in arm but decorum must be observed.  It will be good to relax at the resort and indulge in one another without fear of causing a scene.  The walk seems almost too long and by the time the door slides shut behind them he has both hands on Ren’s hips and a coy smile on his face.

 

“Show me.”

 

“I…” Ren begins, too distracted by Hux’s hands. “Later,” he says, leaning down to take Hux’s lips in his. Hux gives in to him, and Ren nearly groans with relief, reaching up and plucking Hux’s command cap from his head and tossing it on the table so that he can run fingers through his red hair.  

 

“You’re so eager,” Hux murmurs against the persistent mouth that tolerates no argument.  “Let me slip into something comfortable and I’m yours for the evening.”  He hastily ducks another kiss with a grin and squeezes Ren’s hand before heading for the bedroom, heart aching at the forlorn look he receives at leaving their embrace.

Ren sinks down onto the sofa with a sigh, realizing belatedly that he’s left his helmet in the observation gallery. It’s unlikely that anyone will abscond with it, however, for fear of retribution. While he waits for Hux to return, he pulls the note out of the inner folds of his robes and reads it again, tracing its creases with his thumb, brushing it against his lips. He puts it away again before Hux returns.

 

The General emerges in a set of civilian clothes Ren hasn’t seen before.  Fitted wool slacks overlap a collared shirt tucked into the waistband.  It hangs well on his slight frame with sleeves folded at the wrists.  Nondescript but obscenely comfortable-- at least when compared with the uniform.

 

“Would you care for some caf?”

 

Ren reaches out and catches Hux’s slender wrist before the slippery general can escape to some other task that doesn’t involve being in Ren’s arms. “I’d care for you in my lap,” he growls, pulling Hux toward him.

 

Hux lands askew atop the knight’s thighs and adjusts himself so that he’s practically leaning against Ren’s chest.  He places his hands there, feeling the warmth and breadth of it.

 

“Is this how my prince desires me?”  

 

Ren cups Hux’s chin, slides his hand back into his hair, and projects images of Hux’s pale, freckled body naked beneath his, long legs wrapped around his waist, back arched in pleasure, mouth open in a soundless cry of ecstasy. “More like this,” he murmurs into Hux’s ear, feeling his own cock beginning to fill between them.

 

A hot blush creeps over Hux’s cheeks and he turns away until he can calm his breathing.

 

“Wicked boy,” he whispers finally, resting his forehead against Ren’s  Of course he’s thought about it.  Thought about little else if he’s honest with himself.  “Is that the kind of love you’ve been eager for all this time?  I promise you I’m just as taken with the thought of spending a few hours reacquainting myself with your body.  Why do you think I booked the trip without checking with you first?”  His eyes meet the smoldering fire in Ren’s and he frames that perfect face in his hands.  “I can’t wait any longer.”

 

Ren pulls Hux closer, finally allowing his hands to cup Hux’s small, toned ass, bringing their hips together. Hux must feel how hard he is, how much Ren needs him. “I want all of it,” Ren says, kissing him again, teeth on Hux’s bottom lip. “All of you. I’m tired of waiting, too.” His heart flutters, adrenaline cold in his veins even as his skin is hot. “You drive me mad,” he whispers.

 

When Hux gives into another passionate kiss he can’t help but thrust his hips a little, desperate for it.  The gesture is unseemly but it feels so good.  Without a word he’s sliding back towards the sofa cushions, wanting to be laid out with Ren atop him, wanting to feel the full weight of those muscular thighs and the sweet pressure of an urgent erection against his.

 

Wanting to be enveloped in the familiar heat and scent of Kylo Ren.

 

Ren goes willingly, draping his larger body over Hux’s, grinding his hips down where Hux’s legs encircle him. He feels the pressure of Hux’s cock, hard alongside his, and blindly reaches down to fumble at the hem of Hux’s shirt, tugging it free from his pants. Ren slides his fingers up along Hux’s torso, reveling in the intake of breath as he grazes sensitive ribs, rubs a thumb over a peaked nipple. His vision is swimming with need, breath coming shallowly.

 

Hux matches his fervor, drunk on the feeling of Ren enclosed in his thighs.  He tosses his head back with a whimper, nerves aflame as he realizes he’s almost re-creating the scene from Ren’s naughty fantasy.  Invigorated, he pulls his beloved down for a hasty kiss that becomes a shared moan, fearing he’ll come from the taste of his tongue; the wet huff against his cheek.

 

“We should slow down,” he manages, massaging the back of Ren’s neck with one hand while the other traces the tantalizing line of his chest beneath his shirt.

 

Ren is shaking with need, but he inhales deeply and kisses Hux softly, trailing lips across his chin, down his neck, up to his ear. “How slow?” He rolls his hips down, the movement instinct, leaving his breath a soft gasp in his throat.

 

“Slow enough to savor.”  

 

Words fail him as he lets himself melt into each tender kiss, Ren’s mouth a plea and a promise against his.  He finds himself absurdly focused on the feel of Ren’s hair between his fingers, the hot hammer of his pulse as Hux’s brushes his lips against it.  If he isn’t careful he’ll lose his resolve and they’ll end up tangled on the floor in these sparse quarters.

 

“Give me a little room, Pet,” he whispers, tracing Ren’s cheek with his forefinger with all the precision of devotion.

 

Ren shifts, dropping his weight to the side and giving Hux freedom of movement, though he keeps a hand on Hux’s waist, against his bare skin. It’s startling, the amount of self control he must exert not to take without Hux’s permission; Ren feels like a man addicted to some powerful drug he’s been parted from too long, and being offered a taste to slake his thirst.

 

With an easy smile Hux traces Ren’s lips with his finger and then the tip of his tongue.  He pulls away before another kiss can blossom between them, nuzzling his cheek instead.

 

“If I invited you to stay the night do you think we could behave ourselves?  I want to save the first time for a nicer place than this.  But that doesn’t mean we have to deny one another the comforts of shared sleep.”

 

He gazes up at Ren’s face, imploring.

 

Ren tries not to visibly deflate as he slumps onto the couch beside Hux. While he wants more, the idea of sleeping next to Hux, of waking up in his arms, is somehow appealing in an even deeper way, and he finds that he wants that.

 

“You’d make a great Emperor,” Ren mutters, kissing Hux’s bottom lip and raising an eyebrow. “You are adept at making others do what you want them to.”

 

Startled, Hux quashes a laugh.  “You think so, do you?  One of the necessities of command, I assure you.  Though at the moment I’m starting to wonder if I’m made for any purpose but pleasing you.”

 

He nudges his forehead against the knight’s and closes his eyes.  “I’m going to order supper for the both of us and then we’ll see what the night holds, shall we?”

 

“Yes, my liege,” Ren sighs, rolling over onto his back now.

 

Hux gives him a playful swat and busies himself setting the table.  It will be good to have Ren for the evening.  He’s well acquainted with the rewards of delayed gratification but surely spending the night in a long embrace will only sweeten what’s to come.  As they wait for the meal to arrive Hux steps to the viewport and stares out at the stars.  He feels almost princely himself.  As though everything out there might be theirs for the taking if only they have the patience and the courage.

 

Ren watches him from the couch for a moment, thinking that he truly looks as though the universe unfurled before him is an empire awaiting his whim. The thought flickers thought Ren’s mind that Ren alone could give it to him, if he chose.

 

Standing, Ren crosses the space to wrap an arm around Hux’s waist again, pleased when Hux leans back against him, content.

 

“I had something I wanted to show you earlier, in the observation gallery,” he tells Hux. That had been his intention in inviting Hux there, before it was interrupted by their argument and then further still by coming back to Hux’s quarters.

 

The hand offered to Ren is taken without a word and Hux draws him close.  “Show me, then.”

 

Ren brushes his lips against Hux’s knuckles, then lets go of his hand, resting the tips of three fingers against Hux’s cheekbone, the side of his forehead. The physical contact isn’t exactly necessary for what he wishes to show Hux, but it helps to focus.

 

Outside the viewport, the traffic of the space station continues to flow, ships moving at all speeds. The planet beyond is brilliant blue and green and brown and its luminosity makes Hux’s pale skin nearly ethereal. Slowly, Ren reaches out to the Force, letting all the myriad thoughts and voices of the living world beyond the transparisteel flow into his consciousness, and he shows it all to Hux.

 

The general gasps and staggers forward, only to be caught by Ren before he stumbles.  “Ren,” he gasps, voice cracking as the stimuli overwhelms him.  “...what is this?”

 

Ren dials back the connection, not having meant to overwhelm Hux. “This is what it is like to be me,” he tells him softly. “All of this, just a thought away.”

 

“Oh… Ren,” he says when he can speak again because there is nothing else to say.  The desire to take his lover in his arms and comfort him overrules all other thoughts.  For a long moment they stand, embracing in the dim starlight.  Hux drops his forehead to Ren’s shoulder and sighs.

 

“Is there anything I can do?”

 

Ren kisses Hux’s soft hair. “You find it so horrible? If you could have that - if the universe could not close itself to you, wouldn’t you want it?”

 

The question unnerves him.  Perhaps force-users grow used to the constant traffic in their thoughts but he could never find solace in a world where every whim hovered in the air like breath and one could take and discard them at will.

 

“No.  I don’t know.  Maybe.”

 

The transparisteel is cool to the touch when he places his palm against it.

 

“If we could share it, you and I, it might be borne.”

 

The thought touches Ren, unexpectedly. He’d never considered his gift a burden to be shared, but then, he’d never had anyone to share it with. He reaches out and covers Hux’s hand with his own, both of them pressed to the viewport. “I would do anything for you,” Ren tells him, finding it true. Dangerously so.

 

  
“Then we understand one another.”


	4. Chapter 4

Hux wakes with a dry mouth, a full bladder, and a delicious warmth that seems to spread from his gut to his torso and limbs, making fingers and toes tingle.  He’s lying on the bed with a comforting weight against his chest and arm.  After a moment he realizes that some of the warmth is Ren and some of the tingling is from the hand that’s fallen asleep, dead weight beneath his lover’s body.  He pulls himself out of bed and shakes it, walks in blind habit to the refresher to take care of the other urgent signal his body is giving him-- easier contemplated than done with a painful erection-- and then crawls back into bed to cuddle.

 

That is, after all, what they’re doing.  And it’s something he has less experience with than sex, which is what his body seems to want.  Ren is soft and pliable in this state.  Softer, even, than he was last night when they spoke little, saving their breath for drowsy kisses that lingered before fading away to pecks and nuzzles.  Hux snuggles in against him and hums with pleasure as his knight dips his head press his stubbled chin against Hux’s neck.  He hones in on the tickling sensation with a lusty little sigh that embarrasses him.  With single-minded intent he pushes his lover back a little so he can kiss the same spot under Ren’s chin, nipping at the bristly flesh.  It’s bliss, every small scratch against his cheek, his lips.  He feels foolish and content all at once; as though he could attend to Ren here over and over for the sheer joy of doing so.

 

Ren comes online slowly, like rising to the surface of a lazy, warm sea. His eyes flutter open as Hux lips caress his pulse point, and Ren purrs, stroking fingers up Hux’s spine, marveling at how soft his skin is. Ren tangles his hand in Hux’s hair, which is mussed and silken between his fingers, and he feels singular, privileged, that he gets to see Hux this way: sleep-tousled and vulnerable.

 

Ren turns his head, chasing Hux’s lips, capturing them and pressing a hard kiss against Hux’s mouth. He tugs the general closer, hand moving now to the swell of his ass, palming one deliciously pliable cheek. A low growl issues from Ren’s throat, muffled by Hux’s lips.

 

Dizzy with arousal, Hux slings a leg around Ren’s waist, encouraging him to keep exploring with his hands.  They roll together until Hux is on his back, pinned beneath hips and hands and even hard ankles.  Ren’s erection nestles against his own, a searing heat that makes him whimper.  He’s wearing only a long shirt and a loose pair of shorts and Ren is nude but for a pair of briefs.  His hand caresses the heat of the knight’s lower back and trails up along his spine to grasp the back of his neck.  An urgent kiss softens as Hux returns to trace Ren’s jawline with his lips, obsessing over the contour of it.

 

Ren groans, rolling his hips to soak up friction, his cock achingly hard. He moves a hand to Hux’s leg, squeezing the meat of his thigh, trying to pull it closer to him, wrap it more tightly around him. Ren’s heart hammers in his chest, arousal driving his blood pressure up, his whole body begging for release.

 

“I need you,” Ren says, voice raspy in Hux’s ear, muffled when he bites down on the lobe. “Fuck waiting. You’re driving me insane.” He grinds his hips down again, hard, earning a soft keen from Hux that makes him gasp.

 

“Come against me,” Hux whispers, settling Ren between his thighs and pumping his hips to encourage him.  “I’m desperate for you.”  They can do this.  And it will still be special when he lays Ren out on their bed at the resort for more nuanced lovemaking.

 

He looks to Ren for encouragement, wanting to be held and caressed as they work against one another.

 

Ren makes a low noise, reaches between them to hook a thumb over Hux’s waistband. He pushes them below Hux’s hips, then pauses.

 

“I want you naked,” he growls. “I want to feel you.”

 

Hux is glad Ren cannot see the furious blush that burns his cheeks.  “Take them off me, then.”  He slips his own fingers into Ren’s tight briefs to tug them away and soon they’re both struggling in the sheets to undress one another.  Once Hux’s top is over his head he impulsively reaches down and brushes his fingers against the thick nest of Ren’s groin to capture his erection.  When his hand closes around the width of it and curiously strokes the shaft he lets out a huff despite himself.

 

“Aren’t you impressive,” he whispers, curling his fingers just so to make Ren cry out again.

 

Hux’s hand around him feels divine; his fingers are softer than Ren’s own, and they move deftly over him, caressing his length and sending sparks cascading along Ren’s spine. He runs his own hand down Hux’s back, exposed as he lies on his side next to him, and palms one cheek. His fingers ghost along Hux’s crevice, teasing.

 

“You’re perfect,” Ren whispers, kissing him softly.

 

Trying not to preen at the words, Hux takes the opportunity to stroke the inside of Ren’s thighs, enjoying the feel of soft flesh covering powerful muscles.

 

“My handsome prince,” he murmurs against Ren’s neck, rolling onto his back and tugging Ren atop him again.  “I can’t wait to slip inside you.”  He grinds his hips against the knight’s, wanting to restart that delectable friction between them again.

 

A shuddering groan escapes Ren’s lips as he feels Hux’s cock, flushed warm, against his. He can barely register Hux’s words, though when he does he laughs throatily.

 

“Is that the way it’s going to be?” he asks, nuzzling Hux below his ear, flicking his tongue out to caress the lobe. “What if I want my general on his knees?”

 

“My prince can have whatever he desires.  I’m yours, Kylo.  I belong to you.”  He takes Ren’s face in his hands and presses their noses together with a satisfied hum.  “How do you want me?  What would please you?”

 

Ren shivers, feeling his face color at both Hux’s use of the word _prince_ and the riot of images in his mind. “I want everything,” he tells Hux, and it’s true. “I want you to touch me.” He rolls his hips down again, then reaches for Hux’s hand and pulls it down between them, wrapping it around both their shafts. When Hux applies just the barest presses, Ren cries out, back arching.

 

“Fuck,” he growls. “ _Yes_. Like that.”

 

Hux has never done this before but once he gets into the rhythm of it it’s a delight for both of them.  He squeezes harder, unable to cover their combined girth with his hand but making up for it as best he can with an even stroke.  The work is exhausting and he finds himself grunting softly in Ren’s ear, hoping he isn’t making an utter fool of himself.  As the pressure builds he lets go of his own to focus on Ren, working the shaft with his eyes screwed shut in determination.  It’s a relief when the knight begins to spurt, coating his belly with hot semen as Hux sinks back against the bed, panting.

 

“Not bad for being out of practice,” he mutters, offering Ren a shy smile.

 

Ren can only respond with a grunt and a smile against Hux’s neck, which is damp with a fine sheen of sweat. Ren can feel Hux still hard against his belly, and peels himself away to trail kisses down Hux’s chest, avoiding the evidence of his own release, until he’s poised above Hux’s cock. Ren glances up from beneath his lashes, asking for permission silently.

 

“Do you want to?”  The thought of those sinful lips on his cock are enough to have him fisting the sheets.  “If it pleases you it would please me too.  You have no idea how long it’s been.”  Well aware that he’s gazing at Ren like a lovesick adolescent, he reaches out to touch his cheek in gratitude.

 

Ren tilts his face into Hux’s touch, brushing his lips against his fingertips, then lowers his face to press an equally tender kiss to the head of Hux’s cock. He dips his tongue through the slit, tasting salty pre-come, then wraps a hand around the base and takes Hux fully in his mouth. Hux gasps, fingers snagging in Ren’s hair, and Ren purrs.

 

Hux throws his head back and cries out in pleasure, still gripping Ren’s tangled hair.  It’s too unbearably good, being taken this way.  Ren’s tongue presses the underside of his cock with each drag back up the shaft before his hot mouth engulfs him again and again.  He fights to keep from thrusting up into the knight’s mouth but he can’t help but wiggle a little from the sweet torment of it.  Too soon he’s climaxing and Ren, to his credit, takes all of it until he’s at the brink of sensitivity.

 

“Kylo,” he gasps.  “Kylo…  gods… how did you…”

 

On second thought, he’d rather not how and where he picked up that particular skill.  Just now the thought of his prince having anyone else leaves a bitter taste in his mouth and he pulls the knight up for a fierce kiss.  

 

Ren grins against Hux’s lips, sensing the sudden burst of jealousy and surmising where it originated. It’s heady, being wanted this much; he has never felt such possessive devotion, both passionate and yearning. It all resonates in his own chest, as though what is between them through the Force is an intense, endless feedback loop.

 

“I love you,” Ren tells Hux, the roil of feeling coursing through him making his cock stir again.

 

“Then promise me that no one else will ever have the privilege of attending to your desires.”

 

He finds Kylo’s gaze in the dark; the dim glint of his eyes.  “I thought I fell in love with you slowly.  Those days and nights we worked together, feared together-- though you would not admit you too were afraid of retaliation from your master-- I saw you then and I wanted you.  But in truth I fell in love with you when you kissed me goodnight the first time we dined together in my quarters.  And again when you let me fall asleep with my feet in your lap.  And again when you were so eager to see me that you didn’t care a whit about regulations.  And again last night when you started snoring.  You really ought to see one of the medics about that.”  He brushes Ren’s hair back from his forehead, smoothing it out with tender focus.

 

“Will you share my bed?”

 

Ren is momentarily taken aback, chest clenching. He isn’t the speech-maker that Hux is, and cannot form the adequate words. “I thought I was sharing your bed right now,” he murmurs instead, then adds: “And I don’t snore.”

 

“You absolutely do,” Hux chides him, kissing the bridge of his nose.  “I mean in a more… permanent… sense.  Will you share my bed for the rest of my life?”

 

Sliding down onto his side, Ren pulls Hux into his arms, burying his face in Hux’s hair. He imagines all the nights he might be called away from Hux’s side, sent out into the cold dark of space alone, to do Supreme Leader’s bidding. For so many years, that has been his only purpose. Snoke had always held in his palm the promise of power and freedom from his constant pain, and yet he’d always kept that just out of Ren’s reach. He always had just one more task, or one last way Ren must prove himself.

 

Ren’s fingers trace Hux’s back tenderly. “I don’t think that I can serve two masters,” he whispers.

 

For a moment Hux doesn’t understand, and then he does but wishes for a fleeting instant that he might pretend otherwise.

 

“I see,” he says, his voice even.  He wants to tell Ren that Hux will be serving _him_ , for Ren is the only lord and master he ever wishes to serve.  But he knows that kind of sentiment is useless in the light of grim facts.

 

“Then what can you give me, Kylo?  I’ll take whatever you offer me.”  He says finally, unable to keep a waver out of his voice at the thought that this courtship may have come to a halt because Ren was never free to be with him in the first place.

 

Ren realizes that he has been misunderstood, and tightens his grip on Hux as though the general has already begun drifting away from him. He’d sensed what Hux was offering, asking him to share his bed and his life, and that was his fealty and partnership in whole. Not demands and empty promises.

 

“I’m offering you everything,” he admits, almost too quietly to be heard. “All of me.”

 

So it comes to this, Hux thinks, both elated and slightly terrified of the ramifications.  He pulls them flush against one another, limbs wrapped tightly to keep them pressed so close he can hear Ren’s heart pounding in his chest.

 

“In full knowledge of the path before us.  In acceptance of what must be done to protect you from…”  He won’t say it.  Hates to even think it-- but wasn’t it bound to be this way in the end?

  
“Yes, Kylo Ren, I accept.”


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Hux and Kylo finally have a moment alone, and Hux has planned it down to the smallest detail. Everything has to be perfect, even if it's all new.

Hux throws a hopeful look at the mirror as he heads out of the refresher and into the main suite.  He’s gone above and beyond his basic grooming routine as a matter of necessity, unable to imagine donning alluring undergarments to tempt his lover with before being physically presentable to wear them.  With that goal in mind he methodically trimmed and buffed and used a depilatory where necessary in the hopes that Ren will take it as an invitation to explore.  Black lace briefs that slipped easily over smooth legs leave little to the imagination.  An oval cutout in back exposes the cleft of his buttocks but the effect will be hidden by the short satin robe he wears to greet Ren in. 

 

The knight sits on the edge of the bed looking oddly nervous but the way his eyes light up tells the general that all his effort has been worth it.

 

“It’s been a long time,” Hux says simply.  “But I promise to make it good for you.”

 

Kylo realizes he’s staring, his posture alert and eyes round, lips slightly parted. Hux is a mix of demure and sultry, his knees together and one hand clasping the other, letting go, grasping again. Hux is unsure, Ren senses. Proud still, of course, with his shoulders straight and chin elevated just so, but also shy, with a slight crease to his brows and the toes of one foot nervously gripping at the thick white carpet. 

 

Kylo cannot help but admire him, recalling and comparing him to the creatures he’d engaged as a younger man, indulging his whims and fantasies with whatever willing partners could be found at brothels. That was always all he’d had time for, encouraged by his master not to resist temptation, but to embrace it. Those men has been willing enough, soft beneath his hands, had made all the right sounds and pretended, perhaps, to feel pleasure, but Kylo Ren, of course, knew better. Even if their dead eyes hadn’t told a story, Ren could feel their dampened static feedback. He’d given up years ago, enforced celibacy a shield against feeling like he was  _ not enough _ . There simply hadn’t been time or opportunity for something more. 

 

But this. This had come out of nowhere, risen up around him like a flood while he’d stared up at the stars, only looking down in time to realize he was about to drown. And he’d gone willingly; just let go, and floated down, and let it surround him. 

 

Hux is beautiful, of course, with his long pale legs and flat belly, the dusting of freckles over his forearms and shapely thighs that make him look so young. The perfectly trimmed trail of hair below his navel that disappears into those  _ delicious _ lace shorts. He’s mouth-watering, but Ren’s carnal desire is somehow overcome by his fierce need to protect, because Hux looks so uncharacteristically delicate, fragile even.

He sees Hux’s expression begin to darken with doubt, pretty pink lips curling down, and Ren realizes he’s delayed reacting too long, and so he holds out his arms, fingers splayed, inviting Hux to come to him. If there is the barest tug of the Force, it isn’t intentional. Just instinct, casting out.

 

Hux moves as if magnetized, crossing the distance between them so he can place his hands on Ren’s shoulders as though momentarily bracing himself before running his fingers through loose dark hair and settling them against a bare chest.

 

“Take off your clothes and lie down on the bed?”  Hux hates the uncertainty creeping into his voice but as accustomed as he is to giving commands he cannot bear to order Ren to do anything.  “I want you to be comfortable.”

 

It occurs to him that as much as they’ve danced around the issue he has made assumptions about his lover’s history with previous partners and perhaps he should be blunt.

 

“I’m going to start a fire and then I’m going to give you a massage.  Is that agreeable?”

 

Ren suppresses a snort as he smiles and buries his face against Hux’s belly. There is very little Hux might envision in this moment that Ren would find  _ disagreeable _ . The limits are vast. 

 

Hux’s stomach muscles flex as Ren presses a kiss to his tight stomach, then he flinches and huffs a soft laugh when Ren nips at the hair, tugging it with his teeth. Ren has his arms looped around Hux’s legs, and Ren drags his hands slowly down the back of Hux’s silk-smooth thighs as he glances up from beneath his lashes. He feels drugged. He doesn’t want to let go, but he knows Hux well enough to surmise he will have things his way, or no way. 

 

Dropping his arms, Ren leans back, sighs, and smiles in a way he hopes is alluring. “Hurry up then.” 

 

“Anything worth doing is worth doing well,” Hux replies, crooking a finger beneath Ren’s chin to tilt it up.  “And that includes you,” he teases before heading over to start the fire.

 

The mechanism all artifice, of course; a holographic fire that heats via a vent in the stone base, but it’s almost as good as the real thing and safe to leave on all night.  The sound and smell of a real crackling flame are a nice touch and Hux closes his eyes for a moment to enjoy the contrast between the warmth on his face and the night breeze blowing in from the open windows, carrying the sweet scent of loquat trees in the grove outside. 

 

Ren lies naked on his stomach, having turned around on the bed to watch Hux;  the fire paints his eyes with flecks of gold, and for a moment Hux can only stare.  The sly look that crosses the knight’s face gets him moving again, reaching for the massage oil he stashed in the nightstand as soon as they arrived.  He joins Ren on the bed, straddling his bare hips as he warms the oil in his hands before rubbing it into his lover’s back, kneading slowly to loosen the tension there.

 

“I worry about you,” Hux says before he can stop himself, responding to the knots beneath his fingers.  “I see the stress you’re under and I want to take it from you.  I want you to know that you’re safe with me.  I’ll always protect you, Pet.”

 

“Pet…” Ren rumbles, low in his throat. Pleased. “What does that imply, General?” He rolls his shoulders, groaning and pressing his face into the down comforter as Hux’s fingers, deceptively slender, knead into muscles wound with months of tension.

 

For a long moment the only sounds are the pop and hiss of the fire and the low call of a bird in the dark.  Finally Hux slides back onto Ren’s thighs and sinks his hands into the yielding flesh of his firm buttocks with a sigh.  

 

“It implies that you ought to be pampered more often.”  He forces himself to attend to legs and hands and delectable feet first, massaging with a level of skill he’s proud to have acquired, before making his way back up to the spot he wants to spend the most time on.

 

“Has anyone ever attended to you here?” he asks, trying to sound casual about the question as he traces the cleft of Ren’s ass with a slick finger.

 

Ren flinches involuntarily because Hux’s touch is so tender, just the brush of a fingertip, full of offering. 

 

“No,” Ren admits, swallowing. He’s never allowed it before. It had always felt like dominance, which he would not cede to another. 

 

Hux leans in and kisses the back of Ren’s neck before whispering, “May I have the honor?”

 

Ren grunts, unsure at first, only able to imagine what it implies. The feedback he’s gotten from his partners is not encouraging. But he nods after a long pause, fingers curling into the quilt as though bracing himself.

 

With a grateful sigh Hux leans to bestow a kiss on the flesh, smooth and firm as a ripe  _ sihan _ peach.  He presses his nose to the soft underside of one cheek and inhales deeply, indulging in Ren’s familiar musk.  Gentle fingers nudge apart the muscular halves of his buttocks and tug at the thin dark curls that part around the knight’s blushing hole.  Hux pauses to tease the sweet spot between the opening and Ren’s balls with featherlight strokes.  

 

“I like that I’m the first one to savor you” he says, as Ren squirms appreciatively and then gasps and groans when Hux’s lips make contact with the tight furl of flesh.  Elated at the response he traces the rim with the tip of his tongue, drawing a breathy laugh from his partner.

 

“That tickles,” Ren mumbles into the pillow, but he pushes his rear back against Hux’s face just the same, earning himself a pinch.  As he settles in again, Hux closes his eyes and concentrates on coaxing another moan from his partner.  He could lap at the little ring of muscle for hours just to feel it clenching under his tongue, begging for his mouth.  

 

Ren’s eyes are screwed shut, his face flushed to burning such that the quilt beneath feels cool. His fingers are white-knuckled in the bunched fabric, muscles tense; it’s hard to relax into the pleasure, so alien is it. But Hux’s hands are soft, gentle on his upper thighs, smoothing over his buttocks, and parting the cheeks. His tongue is hot, and Ren relaxes by measure, feeling himself starting to open to him. 

 

“Is that good for you, Pet?” Hux murmurs between kisses.  As he waits for Ren’s reply to guide him he impishly wedges his face in deeper to press a slow, secret kiss right up against his entrance, barely flicking his tongue against the spot to reassure Ren that he’ll take his time.

 

_ “Nnff. _ ” Ren twitches, lifts his hips involuntarily. His heart rate has increased noticeably, and he realizes that he’s eager for this. He wants it, in the way that he always wants things: more, and now.

 

Pleased by the response, Hux continues to lick the spot, pausing only to brush his lips and nose against delicate flesh.  Ren loosens and tightens, seemingly torn between relaxing fully into the sensation and keeping his guard up against any intrusion.  When Hux taps the pad of an oil-coated finger there and strokes it he feels the knight begin to open for him.  It’s a hard-won trust and Hux savors it as he works the tip in to get Ren used to the sensation, nuzzling the inside of a thigh as he works to prepare him.

 

“You’re my fondest treasure, Kylo,” he admits.  “And you deserve to be treated as such.”

 

Ren feels his face heat up again, thinks he may never get used to the kind of alien praise that Hux constantly offers him. At the same time, he feels that he would do anything to keep receiving it. 

 

Ren tries to remain still and not squirm away from the feeling of Hux’s finger pressing inside him, tells himself he will get used to it. Hux’s soothing hand on his flank encourages him silently to relax, and he takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly. As he does, he feels Hux slide deeper inside him.

“How does that feel?”

 

He’s worked his finger in to the first joint and hopes that by the end of the evening Ren will be loose enough for what he has planned.  But if he isn’t there’s still plenty they can do together.

 

“Do you want more, Pet?”

 

Ren shifts his hips back experimentally, deciding he likes the feeling. He nods against the bed, reaches back and brushes Hux’s leg, encouraging. 

 

Hux takes Ren’s hand and squeezes it a little as his finger slides in further.  He removes it to add more oil before returning to task, priding himself on each slow push until he’s just far enough to feel around for the nub inside he’s eager to be the first to touch.

 

“Is this good for you?” he whispers, curling his finger to press against it as he grips Ren’s buttocks.

 

“Y-...ahhh…” Ren’s whole body jerks forward as Hux does  _ something _ to him that sends a wave of pleasure up his spine. His cock twitches beneath him, fully hard. “Hux,” he rasps, his tone imploring. The room is quiet around them, the only sound the crackling fire, and so even his soft voice sounds desperate and loud in Ren’s ears. 

 

Hux smiles to himself as he continues stroking Ren inside, leaning in to kiss the small of his back and bite gently at the curve of his ass.  He taps the spot a little, enjoying the little jerks and quivers he earns from the attention.  Ren opens beautifully for him, letting him explore further.  By the time he works a third finger in the knight is moaning and thrusting against the mattress.

 

“Are you ready for me?”

 

“Nnng, yes. Hux, please.” Ren finds himself craving it. The hand on Hux’s thigh squeezes, tries to slide up further, wanting to touch him. “Like this?” He’s always had his partner’s face away from him, usually on their knees. It was impersonal, that way, which had been fine with Ren. 

 

“I want to see your face.”  The general withdraws and nudges Ren over, rolling him onto his back and noting with satisfaction how hard he is.  They gaze at one another for a long moment and then Hux turns to face the nightstand to clean his hands.  He lets the robe slip from his shoulders and fall to the bed

 

When the robe falls away it reveals the way that Hux's tight lace shorts essentially have no back - the oval cutout reveals the swell of his ass, offering easy access. Ren finds himself smiling, cock twitching with need, imagining Hux wearing these beneath his uniform on the Finalizer. He reaches out, traces his knuckles down Hux's cleft, slipping two fingers beneath the fabric at the base of the opening to massage Hux's perineum. 

 

It’s precisely what Hux has been hoping for and the reason he purchased the intimate garment. The feeling of Ren’s hand there has him pushing back against the touch, shamelessly eager.

 

“Wicked thing,” he practically coos, rocking a little to let Ren know that this is exactly what he wants.

 

Ren shifts his fingers in further, marveling at how silk-soft Hux’s skin is; even his balls, which he grazes the underside of, are smooth. 

 

_ “ _ You shaved?” Ren murmurs, incredulous. Suddenly he desperately needs his mouth on Hux, and he moves his hand to the general’s hip, tugging. “Come here.”

 

“I waxed,” Hux says, laughing as he’s pulled roughly atop Ren.  He fights to keep his balance and lets himself be steadied.  It isn’t until Ren keeps pulling that he realizes what it is he wants.

 

“Are you… are you certain?”

 

Ren just growls, low in his throat, maneuvering Hux until his ass hovers over his face and then gently guides him down. Ren nips at the pliable flesh of one cheek, peppers kisses over it, squeezing Hux’s hips before drawing his hands back to part him so he can flick his tongue out, touch it lightly to Hux’s entrance.

 

_ “Oh…”   _ The breathy little moan escapes Hux without warning and then he’s letting loose a humiliating stream of stammered “ahs” and “ohs” to the rhythm of Kylo’s tongue.  He suspects the knight has never done this before as each quick sloppy stroke seems to be for it’s own sake-- savoring him down there without aiming for any particular mark.  And it’s somehow even more arousing knowing that his prince revels in the taste of him.  He bends down to toy with the magnificent erection begging for his touch, kissing the head as his fingers find their way back down to that loosened hole.

 

Ren’s hips jerk involuntarily when Hux presses lips to the head of his cock, and he groans. He wants nothing more than that perfect mouth wrapped around him, to feel himself nudging against Hux’s throat. Bending forward this way, the tip of Hux’s own shaft brushes Ren’s chest, and Ren arches up enough to feel it slide against his skin, leaving a smear of sticky pre-come.

 

“Wait,” Hux says, catching his breath and climbing off his lover with a guilty look.  “Your pleasure comes first.”  

 

He repositions himself between Ren’s legs, kneeling down with every intention of taking him in his mouth. When he glances up at Ren again with large green eyes, both dark-blown with lust and bright with anxiety, Ren pushes himself up a bit, reaches out to capture his arm and pull him back to his lips. 

 

“Come back here. That was nice.” Ren tugs, but Hux is immoveable. 

 

“I’m your vassal.  I belong on my knees.”  The words are absurd in his own ears but he cannot help himself.  In a moment the object of his desire slides between his lips and he struggles to take the length of it.  Focusing on this task renews his feeling of purpose and he frankly enjoys the way Ren’s cock feels in his mouth.

 

Ren’s hand falls away bonelessly from Hux’s arm, dropping to the bed, and he gasps, head lolling back. He struggles to force his eyes open, mere slits, so that he can watch his general’s head with his tousled red hair bobbing over him. Ren props himself on his elbows, taking it in through a half daze. A voice in the back of his mind tells him to argue with Hux, tell him that he doesn’t belong on his knees, that he, Ren, is nothing. But his tongue will form no words. He can only offer needy thrusts of his hips up into that wet heat.

 

What Hux cannot quite manage with his mouth he brings his hands into play for, stroking the shaft as he feels the pressure build.  By the time Ren climaxes he’s greedy for it, letting it leak from the corner of his mouth as he works him through it and then pulling away with an audible swallow and a smile that he fears looks as lust-sick as he feels.

 

After wiping his mouth with the back of his hand he plants a kiss on Ren’s stomach, nuzzling the soft hair that trails down to his crotch.

 

The muscles of Ren’s arms quiver as he tries to hold himself up after his sudden release, which came upon him unexpectedly, violently. He looks down his body at Hux, rubs Hux’s calf with a foot. 

 

“Come here,” he repeats, drowsy. He needs Hux in his arms. 

 

“Worn out, Pet?  We can pick this up later if you wish.”  Hux touches Ren’s face and then heads for the refresher, leaving his knight slumped back on the bed.  There is so much more of Ren to be attended to and he needs to wash his mouth out.  As he rinses and spits he checks himself in the mirror.  The color in his face makes him look quite the blushing virgin.  It’s almost embarrassing.  He heads back out to check on Ren and sits primly on the edge of the bed, reaching out to take his hand.

 

Ren squints at him, unsure how to take this further, or what to say. He’s never done this before. He grunts and rolls over, presenting his slick, stretched ass, assuming Hux will get the idea. He turns his head enough to look back, cheek resting against his arm.

 

“Beautiful,” Hux murmurs as he kneads Ren’s cheeks close to his entrance.  “Insatiable,” he adds, thrilled that Ren is still ready for him.  He rids himself of the undergarment and leaves it in a heap on the floor as he reaches for the lubricant and then crawls up to claim what Ren is offering him.  Feet slide apart to nudge Ren’s calves, letting them bracket his own as he slowly spreads the knight’s legs to give himself a little room.  When he lines up the head of his cock he leans in to press a reassuring kiss to his back and then teases the slick entrance with a shallow push.

 

Ren is still a bit tight but Hux praises him as he steadily works his way inside, easing the passage with sweet talk and slow caresses; stopping only to apply more lube when necessary.  As he bottoms out he grunts softly against the back of Ren’s neck and begins to pump his hips, biting gently at bare shoulders. 

 

Ren hides his face in the crook of his arm as Hux begins to slowly work his hips, biting his lip at the stretch. It’s quite different from Hux’s slim fingers, and he struggles to breath deeply and relax; it comes gradually as Hux moves inside him, taking obvious care if Ren’s own exploits are anything to compare it to. Every shallow thrust pushes Ren’s hips up against the bed so that his cock ruts against the fabric of the quilt. Slowly, it starts to feel good, instead of too much, and he finds his lips parted, wet, soft moans buried against the mattress and heat coiling in his belly.

 

Feeling Ren relax beneath him, Hux smiles into the back of his lover’s neck and rocks his hips more forcefully.  The tight squeeze is incredible and he closes his eyes and lets his mouth fall slack even as he renews his grip on Ren, clutching his shoulders, his face, his chest-- whatever he can get his hands on.  The knight is so pliant beneath him and each moan renews his vigor.  

 

As Hux’s thrusts become deeper and surer, Ren’s pulse climbs, and he tries to press back against him, needing  _ more _ . He shifts an arm, finds Hux’s fingers on his shoulder, and guides that hand to his head. He tries to send Hux images of a fist tight in his hair, of nails on his back, and the thoughts make Ren whine with need.

 

“Oh…” A little huff of amusement escapes Hux’s lips as he complies with the unexpected direction, smoothing and then gripping Ren’s hair, digging one hand into the meat of his shoulder before raking his fingers along the edge of his back with a little shudder.  He’s so eager to be tender that it hasn’t occurred to him that Ren may want a little rougher play.  It’s not his first instinct but he tries, twining sweaty hair around his fingers and giving it a little tug in time to the snap of his hips.

 

“K-Kylo,” he whimpers, “I’m so close…”

 

Hux tugging at his hair, even it it’s still rather on the gentle side, goes straight to Ren’s cock, and he groans, trying to fit a hand between his body and the mattress to grasp himself. When Hux says he’s close, Ren can’t help but picture it - those slender hips stuttering through his climax, spilling hot inside him. He doesn’t even think to consider that the channel is still open between their conscious minds until he hears Hux gasp.

 

It’s the push Hux needs to get him over the brink, his cry muffled by Ren’s shoulder as he empties himself inside, every muscle tensing and relaxing as his heartbeat swells in his ears.  He grinds hard against Ren, thrusting deep until he’s wrung through, and all but collapses atop him.

 

And Ren is so warm, and his broad back softer than Hux could have ever imagined.  He slumps against the body beneath him, wrinkling his nose as Ren’s hair tickles it and enjoying the easy slide of their sweat-soaked skin, even as he knows it will grow sticky and clammy between them if he doesn’t move and clean Ren up.  But he can’t move-- can’t even roll over.  His eyes are so heavy that he shuts them for a moment and fights the urge to dose with his flaccid cock still caught in Ren’s heat.  Sleep comes anyway, knocking him into a dreamless black.

 

Ren feels Hux’s energy swell as he comes, almost enough to drive him over the edge as well, but then Hux’s movements falter, and he flags, relaxing against Ren’s back. Ren is still achingly hard, with his fist trapped beneath him, but with Hux’s limp weight atop him, he has no room to maneuver. It’s almost funny.

 

“Hux,” Ben grunts, shifting his hips. He can feel the tickle of Hux’s come trickling down over the fine hairs of his ball sac.

 

Jolted from sleep Hux blinks bleary eyes and makes a small noise of annoyance.  It dawns on him slowly that he is still lying atop Ren, still nestled in him, and apparently drooling on his shoulder.  

 

_ “Kriff…” _

 

Mortified, he wipes at his mouth and tries to roll over but his legs are like lead weights.

 

“Sorry,” he mumbles against the back of Ren’s head.  “Kriff, I’m so sorry…”  He raises his weight on unsteady arms and then falls awkwardly to one side as his ejaculate drips across one thigh.  Hux takes a deep breath and cracks his eyes open.

 

“Are you… did you…?”  His mouth is like sandpaper, his swallow audible.  “Did you finish?”

 

Ren rolls over stiffly, stretching before pulling Hux into his arms and rutting his still-hard cock against Hux’s hip. “What do you think?” he purrs, kissing Hux’s jaw. A slight breeze rolls in from the open window, fluttering the curtains as Ren watches from the corner of his eyes, feeling cool across his super-heated skin. 

 

Reaching for Ren’s erection comes automatically to Hux but he’s so tired that he whines into a half-hearted pump.  “I’m sorry,” he whispers, “... selfish of me.”  He tightens his grip and closes his eyes again, using the reserves of his strength to stroke as quickly as he can manage before realizing with a humiliated sigh that it’s a pathetic hand-job he’s attempting.

 

“Give me a moment,” he mumbles against the mattress.  “I’ll give you my mouth… just give me a moment.”

 

Ren hides his face in Hux’s neck, nipping at the skin of his shoulder. “Just turn over,” he suggests, nudging Hux. “Take me between your thighs.” He’d like more than that, but Hux isn’t ready for him, and it would take longer to get him that way than it would for the few strokes Ren needs to bring him to release. 

 

Hux obeys, rolling onto his back and clenching his thighs together as he flings his arms above his head.  He knows he’s a mess but tries not to worry about that.  It’s haphazard, what they’re doing, and he’s already cursing himself for his lack of stamina.  It’s been too long… far too long.

 

Ren grabs the lubricant where it lies on the bed, flicks the top open, and coats himself liberally and somewhat messily. He climbs atop Hux, kissing his neck, aching to fill him, though he only slides himself between Hux’s soft upper thighs. He feels the grip tighten around him, Hux arching and tangling his hand Ren’s hair. Ren gives a trial stroke.

 

“Mmm,” he groans softly, mouthing at Hux’s neck as he picks up a rhythm. “Talk to me.”

 

“I wish I could take you ten times in a row,” Hux laughs wearily as he tugs black locks and then tucks a few strands behind Ren’s ear.  “I wish…” he grunts as he squeezes his thighs tighter. “...wish I could give you the pleasure you deserve.  Prince of my heart…  I live for your satisfaction.”

 

“Do you?” Ren grunts against his ear, breath hot on his skin. “Tell me you belong to me.” He’s already close, was close to begin with. 

 

“I’m yours.  I’ve always been yours.  I’ll always be yours.”  He strokes Ren’s cheek, traces the length of his neck with an adoring hand.  “Come for me, Pet.”

 

Hux’s soft tone of command, the fingers that give a subtle jerk to his hair, are all Ren needs to plummet over the precipice. He bites down on Hux’s neck, crying out as he spills between his thighs, gasping with each shuddering aftershock. His muscles quiver as he pumps himself dry, collapsing at last atop Hux, heartbeat loud and ragged in his ears. 

 

“It will be better next time,” Hux whispers, “I promise.”  He holds Ren close, relishing the warmth between them as the breeze chills his skin.  “You belong to me too and I won’t have anything but the best for you.  It’s been a long time since I’ve had anyone this way.”  He sighs and presses a kiss against the side of Ren’s neck.

 

Ren sighs as Hux opens his legs beneath him, relieving the pressure on his oversensitive cock. He rolls to the side, guiding Hux into his embrace. “It was perfect this time,” Ren tells him, and he means it. Just now, everything feels perfect, and he wishes that it could go on forever. He presses his cheek against Hux’s mussed, sweat-damp hair. There are a hundred things he wants to say, but they all sound plaintive in his head. “Stay with me, Hux,” he says instead, meaning it in all the ways he can.  _ In his arms, in this bed, in his life. _

 

“Oh, don’t think for a moment you can get rid of me,” Hux retorts, reassured beyond measure at Ren’s words and at the deep sense of contentment he can sense coming off his knight.  As he settles in for sleep he realizes that for the first time in his life he’s approaching a feeling that he’s always dismissed as poetic exaggeration.

  
He’s not merely content.  He’s happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Now with a drawing of Hux's lacy drawers by [Katherine](http://katherine1753.tumblr.com/post/157924845194/i-promised-gentleman-caller-to-draw-huxs-lacy)!! ^_^


	6. Chapter 6

When Hux wakes in the middle of the night he realizes they haven’t had a proper dinner.  There is a small upscale restaurant downstairs that stays open at all hours.  He could slip into some of the fine new clothes he bought for the leave or have food ordered up.  Ren must be hungry.  

 

Thinking of Ren makes him smile and roll over in the sleeping knight’s embrace.  Not sleeping anymore, though.  Ren stirs and favors him with a kiss on the temple.

 

“I bought those things for you,” Hux says shyly, apropos of nothing  “Those frilly underthings.  I wanted you to enjoy them.

 

Ren tightens his hold, reveling in the way that Hux’s lithe body fits against his. “You’re gorgeous, baby,” he sighs into Hux’s hair, kissing his forehead, getting a mouthful of red hair.

 

That brings a fresh grin to the general’s face.

 

“Baby?”  he pulls back to give Ren an amused look, testing the unfamiliar endearment on his tongue.  “Really?  I’m a General of the First Order.”  But inside he preens a little.  No one has called him sweetly in so long...

 

“Mmmm,” Ren purrs, nuzzling into Hux’s neck. “And just what would your subordinates think if they saw you in that pretty lace?” Ren strokes his hand down Hux’s back, his skin warm from being snuggled against him beneath the blankets. He trails a fingertip along Hux’s cleft, feeling his own cock starting to stir at Hux’s naked proximity and willing body.

 

“They would think,” Hux says after a moment of consideration and keen enjoyment of the touch, “that you, Kylo Ren, are a _very_ lucky man.”

 

It’s impossible to keep from pushing back against Ren’s fingers, impossible to pretend he isn’t coming to life again at the gentle way they explore his body.

 

“Especially,” he adds, bringing his voice down to a whisper, “when you see what else I packed to show you.”

 

Ren nips at Hux’s shoulder, imagination rife with alluring images. He’d always admired the way Hux had always presented himself as all business, hard lines and sharp angles, always in control. The picture of him as soft and almost... delicate, for some reason stirs him in a deeper way than anything about Hux yet has.

 

“Are you going to show me?” Ren murmurs as he kisses up Hux’s throat. “Unless it involves you putting on clothes.”

 

“I’ve got a better idea.”  Hux reluctantly pulls away to trace Ren’s lips with a finger.  “Let’s have a meal sent up to the room.  We can eat in front of the fire.  What do you think?”  The thought excites him, especially as they won’t have to dress to go out. But he searches Ren’s face for a sign of approval.

 

Ren leans in for a kiss, eyes lidded, more interested in satisfying other types of hunger. He pulls Hux’s naked body closer, rutting his half-hard cock against Hux’s hip. “I think we should stay in bed for the next three days, at least.”

 

“Oh, Pet,” Hux admonishes him, playfully swatting at his shoulder, “we’ll have plenty of time for that tomorrow… today,” he amends, after a swift glance at the chronometer.  “I do have to eat, you know.  Don’t you want to get your strength up for later?”

 

Giving in to Ren’s mouth he luxuriates in a long kiss, sucking gently at his upper lip and then rolling away when his hold slackens to reach for the button that will call room service.  Whoever designed the place obviously knew their clientele-- the apparatus was set up within reach of the bed.

 

Ren makes a small noise that sounds dangerously similar to a whine as Hux rolls away from him, though he keeps an arm looped around Hux’s waist. Above the blankets, which are pulled up almost to Ren’s chin, it’s chilly with the cool mountain air of pre-dawn.

 

Pleased by Ren’s persistent arm around him Hux presses the button on the wall over the bedside table that turns the surface of the table itself into a touchscreen right over the glass.  He selects a few native fruits, nuts, and a bit of chocolate.  By the time he snuggles back against Ren the door panel buzzes and Hux calls for it to open.  It’s a primitive droid that brings the tray and Hux orders it to be set up by the fire before the droid departs in a frantic four-legged gait.  

 

“Come on,” he whispers, pulling the covers back to coax his lover out.  The breeze buffets his naked skin but the floor is blissfully warm on his bare feet.  He slips on the little robe he’d shed last night and pads over to the thick rug by the fire in easy reach of the low tray.

 

Ren sighs, but it ends on a smile and he rolls out of bed, tugging a pillow out with him. He doesn’t bother with clothes, and follows Hux over to their dinner spread. He settles on one side, propping himself on the pillow, and when Hux begins to sit down across from him, Ren holds a hand out and beckons to him.

 

“Over here. By me.” He’s been denied the feeling of Hux’s body against his long enough, and wants him close.

 

Hux happily accepts, taking Ren’s hand and then sitting beside him.  He pats his lap.

 

“Here,” he says, “I promise I’m more comfortable than any pillow.”  In the moment there’s nothing he wants more than the absurd romantic cliche of his partner reclining in his lap while he feeds him from his own hand.  The careful choices of finger foods are no accident.

Ren shifts, laying his head in Hux’s lap and turning his head to nuzzle into the downy hair below Hux’s navel. He nips gently at the soft belly, making Hux flinch and let out a huff of laughter as he tries to tuck his robe closer around himself like a shield against Ren’s attentions.

 

Ren looks up at him and smiles lazily as Hux plucks something off the table. “You look funny from this angle,” he informs Hux, stretching his arm up to brush Hux’s cheek with the backs of his fingers.

 

Hux silences him with a ripe cherry, pushing it between plush lips before licking his finger and taking one for himself.  It tastes remarkably fresh and he wonders if they’re native to this moon.  A slice of jybbuk-fruit follows, which Ren practically sucks from his hand.  For a moment he’s so fixated on feeding him that he forgets himself, longing to kiss Ren’s red-tinged lips.  He picks up a piece of chocolate instead and takes a bite.

 

“I wish we never had to leave this place.”

 

Ren watches Hux nibble on the chocolate, sees him staring out the window with a look of longing on his face. Not for the first time, Ren considers what it would be like to not have to share Hux with his duties, not to ever have to leave his side at Snoke’s order. Could they truly have something like this? A home where they would be happy, a purpose in each other?

 

When Ren says nothing, Hux looks down at him and smiles, brushing Ren’s hair back and feeding him the other half of his chocolate. It’s rich, just a touch on the bitter side, and Ren thinks as he takes his time chewing. Licking his bottom lip afterward, he says: “What if we could stay? Not here, obviously, but … somewhere. Just us.”

 

It isn’t as though Hux hasn’t thought about it.  He’s thought about almost nothing else.  Only the time they spend in intimacy distracts him from the growing dread that they must take action soon or lose this entirely.

 

“What if we could?” he begins, tentative.  “If there were a way… if we had the means could you…”

 

He can’t quite say it but he invites Ren in nonetheless, gazing down at him as he smooths a thumb over his lower lip and brings it to his mouth to lick away the chocolate.

 

_Could you keep us safe?  Could you protect us?_

 

_You know I could. There is nothing I cannot do for you._

 

Ren intends no arrogance, wanting only to relay his utter confidence.

 

Hux glances down at him, startled.  He’s seen Ren’s power in the force and felt the brush of Ren’s thoughts when they were particularly close but never a directed statement.  It’s almost alarming.

 

“You serve a powerful master.  But no power in this universe exists without… complications.  Exactly how powerful is the Supreme Leader?”

 

This is treason.  But they crossed this line many nights ago.

 

Ren regards him intently. “You would really give up your command? Betray everything you’ve worked for?” Hesitating for a moment, Ren adds tentatively: “For me?”

 

“For no one if not you, Kylo.”  Hux says, touching his lover’s mouth again, finding comfort in the curve of his lower lip.  “I was raised for a purpose and with deliberate intent.  I have been shaped to fill one role in this life and you’ve given me a chance at another.  Your master’s command over the First Order is not as complete as he believes it to be.  Starkiller could have won this war for us if not for his…”  He shakes his head and closes his eyes “...foolish disregard for the power the Resistance still has it his command.  Do you understand what will happen now?  How this war will drag on until the galaxy had been destroyed?  There is no order in his vision.”

 

He’s talking to himself as much as to Kylo now, saying the things he dared not to give voice to before.  The fears that have kept him awake night after night as he contemplates the fallout of Snoke’s orders.

 

“Our cause has been compromised.  And I still cannot bring myself to lament what has been taken from me so long as I have you at my side.  I have given myself a thousand times to a greater purpose and nothing has been returned to me-- _nothing!_  Except you.  So it seems I finally have my reward and all I have to do to claim it is walk away from my life and join yours.”

 

Ren lets out a slow breath, having held it as Hux spoke. He had thought they were sharing idle dreams, things only to be whispered of at night, behind closed doors, and yet it seems that Hux is, after all, serious. Ren shifts from his prone position in the floor, sits up to face Hux. Suddenly, he feels ridiculous having this conversation stark naked, and so he tugs a throw blanket out of the chair with a gesture, then wraps it around his shoulders.

 

“And what would we do?” he asks, imagining the sort of life his father had led, always with someone a parsec behind him, dogging his heels. “Snoke was able to sense me in my mother’s womb; I doubt there is a way I could hide from him. He would have to be destroyed.”

 

“I was afraid you’d say that.”  Hux picks up a corner of the blanket and sidles up to Ren to share it with him, placing a hand on his thigh.   “I’ve given this some thought.  You and I know more about Snoke’s vision than anyone else.  We are uniquely suited to subterfuge-- wouldn’t you agree?”  Giving Ren’s leg a comforting squeeze he gestures with the other hand as though to outline his plan.

 

“I believe your former people could do the dirty work for us seeing as we share a mutual enemy.  Isn’t there a way we might contact them-- anonymously of course-- to tell them what they need to know?”

 

Ren scoffs, begins to say that it would be impossible, but he knows that it isn’t. He feels sure that if he wanted, he could always find a way to get a message through to his mother. He had thought that he had a binding sense of loyalty to Snoke, but now that he has tasted true companionship, true belonging, everything that came before seems hollow.

 

Nodding, Ren reaches down and twines his fingers through Hux’s hand where it rests against his thigh. “We could. There would still be a danger of retaliation, until he is defeated. We would have to be sure they’d be successful, expedient.”

 

“Then we have the beginning of the plan.  We have hope.  You and I may survive this yet.”  He brings their clasped hands to his chest.  “We must devise a method for the delivery of this information.  Leave that to me.  And as for the information itself I leave it to you as I leave my eternal trust.  And my heart.”

 

Pulling Kylo’s hand to his mouth, he kisses it reverently.

 

“Let’s shower and dress.  I want to see the sunrise with you.”   

 

-

 

Clouds had blown in overnight, scudding across the sky like pebbles, creating a canvas for the rising sun to paint brilliant orange and purple and lilac. It’s chilly, though the wind is gentle, barely stirring the fronds of fragrant evergreens that abut the property. They walk a stone path through a manicured fountain garden, sculptures of steel, bronze, stone, all beautiful beneath a trickling sheen of water. It seems quieter here than even indoors, in the privacy of their room, as though they’re encased in a bubble that renders the sounds of civilization mute.

 

Ren’s hand is in Hux’s, and he realizes that he’s never done this, never taken a leisurely stroll holding the hand of a lover. It makes him more aware of how much Snoke has stolen from him, how he’d absorbed Ben Solo, and is doing the same to Kylo Ren. It bolsters his resolve to break free of it.

 

“If we could go anywhere,” Hux says suddenly, “do anything-- anything you could imagine-- where would you like me to take you?”

 

Ren glances at Hux, seeing his eyes bright in a way they’ve never been before. Like he’s looking into the future already, and eager for it. Turning back to the path at his feet, he contemplates the question as he puts one foot before the other. He’d never imagined anything for himself beyond what Snoke bid him to do, never dreamed of a destiny of his own making.

 

Then he realizes that is not true. _Kylo Ren_ has never had such dreams, but Ben Solo once imagined himself truly following in his namesake’s footsteps, seeking wisdom and enlightenment on the planet where rumor says his grandfather had been born. He’d thought of it as a way to truly connect, to come full circle.

 

“I’d like to see the homeworld of my grandfather,” Ren tells Hux, glancing at him again to see if Hux finds this childishly sentimental.

 

Hux glances up in mild surprise and then nods.  It’s fitting Ren would wish to pay respects to a figure who helped to shape his life.  “I promise you we will.  I’ll find a way to make it happen.”  He pauses their walk to pull Kylo into a close embrace.  “Anything you desire you will have so long as it’s in my power to give it to you.”

 

Ren loops his arms around Hux’s waist, presses his cheek to Hux’s forehead and lets his eyes drift shut, allowing the world around them, the universe itself, to be reduced to nothing but this moment, the feel of Hux in his arms, the way his hair smells like the sweet floral shampoo the resort provided , the rise and fall of his chest as he breathes. He imprints this in his mind, marks it as the first step to another life.

 

 _I promise you the same_ , he sends to Hux. _Anything in my power, I will do for you._

 

Hux isn’t certain if the stirring passion that wells up at him at the promise is entirely his or something they’ve created together.  He succumbs to it nonetheless, seeking Kylo’s lips to bestow a small kiss that grows in intensity as they clutch at one another in this secluded spot.  It’s a heady, invincible feeling that overtakes him.  They are powerful enough to weather any storm together.   He wants to tell Ren not to worry about this undertaking-- or anything ever again, for that matter.  But words would underwhelm.  He concentrates instead on Kylo’s mouth, the soft inhalation as they pause for breath before another kiss, the warmth of his skin beneath Hux’s fingers, his palms.  For the general there will never be anything else but the promise of this warmth against his hands and each breath like the sharing of life between them.


	7. Chapter 7

Ren can hear the melody of the desert: tiny grains of sand sliding across one another, the susurrus of the barest wind in the kolva grass, the padding of tiny feet across a sun-baked rock as a thire lizard crawls upward to sun itself. He can hear the galaxy beyond, the hum of atmosphere and the pulse of stars.

 

He is waiting, as he waits every day for hours upon this hillside, sitting cross legged and as still as stone. His hair is long now, tugged into a loose knot at the top of his skull, tendrils curling around his face and tickling his skin where the wind caresses it. He does not notice, however, for he is listening. 

 

The universe holds no answers for him today, though, just as it has not for the last three months. Opening his eyes, Ren can see that the smaller of the two suns has moved nearly to the horizon, and shadows have fallen at the base of the ragged outcropping that shelters their home. The drab landscape of high afternoon is transformed by impending dusk into striations of brown and yellow and pale blue, sand that will glisten like silver when the moon rises. 

 

Ren had expected the planet of his grandfather’s birth to be harsh, as it is, but he had not expected it to be beautiful. 

 

Standing, he dusts his robes off, sending a cloud of sand sailing down the slope of the hill. Hux has an obsession with keeping sand out of their home, which Ren knows to be a pointless pursuit, but he indulges him with the effort. Glancing down toward the squat, white dome that leads to their underground abode, Ren smiles to see Hux still at work on the moisture collector. Unlike Ren, Hux keeps his pale skin swathed in cloth, having discovered early on that he in fact does not tan; rather, he breaks out into a multitude of “undignified” freckles which cause him no end of despair.

 

Trudging down the hill, Ren sneaks up on him and captures him around the waist with one arm.

 

Though they’ve been together for months Hux still finds the casual comfort of his partner a novelty.  They can spend the entirety of the day together-- and often do-- and their life has no order beyond what they impose on it; Ren his meditation and Hux his list of projects to ease their living here.

 

It’s easy to lean into the half-embrace and favor Ren with a smile.  “I didn’t expect you till later in the evening.  Are you here to distract me?”

 

He’s half-joking and half-hoping.  The moisture collector needs a part what he’ll have to go into town for and he’d prefer to make the journey in the morning before the heat of the day sets in.  It’s irritating to not have a quick fix at hand.  He wants to feel useful… needed. 

 

Hux is superheated by working in the sun all day; they both are, but Ren seems to bear it better. Even with Hux wearing light colors, Ren can feel the heat rolling off him, and the fabric of his tunic is damp with sweat. 

 

“You need to go inside,” Ren growls at him. “You’re baking.” He drops a kiss on Hux’s nose to soften his words. “And you have a new freckle, right there.” 

 

It’s not true, but it’s worth it to watch Hux’s gloved hand fly to his nose and scrub, as though that would dislodge the offending mark. Ren smiles, letting Hux go and swatting him on the behind. “Indoors. Now.” 

 

Hux is in no mood to put up even a token argument so he dutifully leads Kylo inside, taking his hand for the pleasure of doing so.  Because there is no one to object, to remind him of his “duty”, to spoil his joy in Ren.  He heads down the narrow set of stairs that lead to their partially underground dwelling.  Once inside the tunic hits the hamper in their shared bedroom and he goes to the mirror to inspect his face, wrinkling his nose at what he sees.  He’s redder than a ywafruit and sweat catches in his hairline.  Even his red-tinged bead is damp with it.  Living on Tatooine makes him want to shower four times a day but a water shower is a waste of precious resources.  He’ll have to make do with the sonic.

 

He’s about to undress fully when he catches the blink of a new item on the scrolling feed he keeps linked up in their bedroom at all times.  They’re far from the war but news travels quickly.  As he activates the primitive text mode his mouth drops.  News of the Resistance.  The military channel is largely propaganda but reading between the lines he finds desperation in the pitiful boast of a somewhat successful ploy to push the Resistance fleet out of First Order territory.  To the largely ambivalent population on Tatooine such a message might read as a hollow victory of the First Order.  To the former General Hux it’s a red and bloody flag of defeat.

 

For the first time in weeks he allows himself to hope that they will hear news of the Supreme Leader-- the outcome he has barely permitted himself to even consider.

 

“Ren,” he hollers, “Come and look at this.”

 

Ren toes the conservator door shut, carrying a glass of chilled oro juice to the bedroom. He takes a small sip, intending most of it for Hux, when suddenly he feels the room tilt. He darts a hand out for the wall, trying to steady himself, feeling like the air is being sucked out of his lungs. There is a huge backwash in the Force, like the sea being pulled back before a tsunami, but there is only a void beyond that sensation. It makes his stomach feel hollow, his ears ring.

 

When Ren is master of himself once more, he sees that he is on his knees, the cup that had been in his hand on the floor, blood-orange juice pooling on the flagstone.

 

Hux is immediately at his side, gripping him.

 

“What’s wrong, my darling?”  He knows that Ren is keenly influenced by the force but he’s never seen anything like this.  “Ren, speak to me.”  He barely notices the juice soaking his pant leg.

 

Ren doesn’t answer immediately, casting out with the Force to try to glean the reality of the message he had just received. Letting out his breath slowly, he looks up at Hux with wide eyes, reaches out and curls his fingers into Hux’s dusty trouser leg. 

 

“Hux,” he croaks. “Snoke. Gone.” He says it quietly, as though words any louder will tear the truth away. For it is true. Ren senses it as surely as he senses Hux’s presence before him.

 

Hux wants to grab Ren by the shoulders and demand confirmation.  Is this a premonition?  Could it possibly be that the Supreme Leader has perished?

 

Instead he gently helps Ren to rise, murmuring reassuring words as he takes him to their bed.  The spill can be attended to later.   He carefully removes his trousers and then sits beside Ren, taking his hand.  Not trusting himself to speak for fear he will overwhelm his partner he merely brushes a dark lock of hair from his eyes and squeezes the fingers interlocking with his.  Ren is breathing hard and doesn’t seem to be looking at anything at all.  If it is a premonition Hux knows it must be worked through on his own terms.  And a premonition still means hope.  Something they’ve had so little of lately.

 

Hux’s tender ministrations gradually restore Ren’s sense of time and place, and he meets his eyes, reaching up to touch Hux’s sunburnt face. “Snoke is really gone, Hux,” he tells him. “We’re free.” He doesn’t mention the Resistance, or Rey, or Luke. He remains hopeful that he had purchased their chance at freedom with the information that has just led to this moment. 

 

Ren finally allows himself to smile, relief sprouting in his chest, and he pushes Hux back on the bed and straddles his hips in his still-dusty robes and kisses him fiercely. He draws back just enough to grin at him. “You know what this means, right?”

 

Hux’s heart hammers in his chest as he gazes up at Ren, afraid to acknowledge this best case scenario in case it slips from their fingers.

 

“I… Are you certain?  If it’s true then it means…”

 

He swallows, head filling with all the consequences of this new information.  In the immediate it means victory, pure and simple.  In the long term it might mean complications but complications they will face together without fear.  His lover is free…

 

“What about the scavenger girl?  Is she....”  Alive? Coming for them?  He doesn’t know how to put voice to his other fear.

 

Ren silences Hux’s fears with another soft kiss, smoothing back the wild red hair. Hux’s beard tickles, always does, but Ren loves it. “I think she will not seek us. I think she will value my mother’s wishes.” He pauses, something else coming to him, a truth striking accord suddenly. “I think we will see her again. My mother.” 

 

Hux can only nod.  He is less certain of anything favorable coming from running across General Organa but he trusts Ren with his life.

 

“I have a bottle of wine stashed away for a special occasion.  I think this fits the bill, don’t you?  Why don’t you let me put together the evening meal and then we’ll enjoy ourselves tonight.”  He is still reeling from the news but now there is a clear path forward.  They will take this victory for all it’s worth.

 

He kisses Ren again, a deeper kiss with a hint of unrestrained happiness in it.  He stands and pulls Ren up beside him.  After he dons the simple robe he wears around the house he touches the knight’s face, afraid of his own emotions brewing in him.  Afraid he’ll burst.

 

“Are you going to be alright?”

 

Ren moves his hand over Hux’s where it rests against his face, curls his fingers around it and squeezes. “We will both be alright,” he assures him. “Grow old and dusty together on this planet.” When Hux’s face blanches at that, Ren winks. “Or maybe somewhere with trees. Lakes. A different planet every few years. Who knows? We can do what we want.”

 

“I just want to be where you are,” Hux said simply, meaning it.  “You’re my home, Ren.”

 

Ren feels his face warm, and leans in to kiss Hux before pulling him toward the kitchen. While Hux prepares dinner, Ren mops up the juice and returns the cup to the kitchen, then he helps Hux peel vegetables, marveling at how simple and domestic their life has become. He once had a universe at his fingertips, waiting only for him to wrap his hand around it, and he’d let it go for this. Standing in a small kitchen on a backwater world with Hux, who’d given up the same thing for him. It’s balance, and perhaps the only balance he could ever have achieved.

 

They eat in relative silence.  Each bite tastes new to Hux-- as though the flavors of the simple fare have never come through until now.  He gazes at Ren, unabashedly enjoying the sight of him savoring their meal.  When Ren wipes a bit of sauce from his lip and licks it from his finger anticipation blossoms in his stomach.  He’ll bring the wine out later, after they’ve digested a bit, so they won’t be too sleepy to enjoy the rest of the night.

 

As Hux takes their plates he asks Ren to join him in the shower.  To hell with the water allowance, they’ll live like royalty tonight, he and his prince.

 

The shower is a welcome thing, Ren having not felt water on his skin in more than a month. The sonic showers are effective, but they are lacking, unsatisfying, and don’t allow for the experience of wrapping one’s arms around one's lover and standing close beneath the spray, or feeling beloved hands scrub the skin of his back, work fingernails against his soapy scalp and allow him to do the same.  Soon hands find intimate places, an unspoken agreement to take care of each other and clean what needs cleaning, and Hux laughs against Ren’s shoulder as he’s tickled just so.  The spot somewhat neglected over the long tense nights that have come before.

 

Ren thinks Hux is pretty, freshly scrubbed and pink from the warm water, and he interrupts him drying off with kisses to his bristly jaw, his shoulder, Ren’s hair dripping on him and earning him an exacerbated look. “I think we should go to bed before we drink wine,” Ren purrs, palming Hux’s ass through the towel he’s wrapped around his narrow hips. The new found feeling of freedom, of having a future, has keyed him up, made his spirit hum with energy that needs to be released. 

 

Spurred on by Ren’s playful mood Hux nips at his lover’s neck, brushing his beard against the base of it.  

 

“If you like,” he responds.  He’ll need no wine to lift his spirits, the giddy thrill that overtakes him is it’s own intoxication.  But it’s always been this way with Ren.  

 

He tugs at the towel draped over Ren’s shoulders and slowly removes it to hang on it’s hook.  His own follows.  It feels good to be in the nude together with the relief of water droplets cooling his skin.  Ren will have it aflame soon enough.

 

“Lie down on the bed,” he says, curling a lock of Ren’s long hair around one finger.  He loves it this length, loves the way it fans out on the bed when his knight lies beneath him.  “I’ll prepare you.”

 

Though they’ve both been tested by the stress of the past few months Ren has borne the brunt of it and Hux has included an evening ritual of relaxation for his partner.  He expects to take the lead on this, as he always does, because Ren needs the extra care.  And because Hux can’t deny him anything.

 

Ren grunts, grabbing Hux by the hips and pulling him flush. He leans in to nip gently at the flesh of Hux’s neck, Hux tilting his head back to bare his throat with a sigh. Ren trails kisses up his neck to his ear, whispers in it. “No, you lie down. I have energy I need to work off.” 

 

He smirks at Hux, then spins him and gives him a push toward the bed.

 

Hux laughs despite himself as he stumbles forward and then crawls up onto the bed, craning his neck to favor Ren with a look of invitation.

 

“Is that how you want it?” he murmurs, wiggling his hips a little.  It’s a surprise of the best kind.  As he tosses his head to flick his unruly bangs back another little chill works it’s way down his spine.  He needs nothing so much as Ren’s overpowering warmth-- the way his beloved entangles him in it.

 

Ren lets his knees relax against the mattress, shifting his weight to them and running a hand up Hux’s spine, enjoying the way he shivers beneath his touch. He draws the hand back down, dipping below Hux’s torso to circle one nipple with his forefinger, then traces the contours of Hux’s ribs, his soft belly, which Ren loves so much. He only briefly palms Hux’s cock, savoring the particular feel as it is just beginning to thicken with his touch. Then he brings both hands to Hux’s hips, thumbs catching the flesh of his ass and parting the pale cheeks. 

 

Leaning down, Ren touches the very tip of his tongue to Hux’s entrance, not even a caress. Hux’s body quivers as Ren traces the puckered rim delicately enough to offer only the most ticklish of sensations. Then he turns his face aside, captures the flesh nearby, and bites softly.

 

The sound that works its way past Hux’s lips is potent with need and it’s all he can do to keep from pushing back against Ren’s teasing mouth.  

 

“Please,” he begs, both because he’s desperate and because Ren loves to hear it.  The gentle bite is like a brand to the flesh, sending a pulsing heat to the furthest reaches of his body.  He feels as though he could open for Ren right now through sheer force of will-- for nothing but that soft pink tongue and all it’s tender intent.

 

_“Please.”_  It’s a whine now and the pitch of it is enough to make him redden with shame-- how wanton has he become for this man?

 

Ren smiles at the tenor of that word, pleased with the want in Hux’s voice. Hux has taken the lead in their sexual encounters, most often because Kylo finds it so terribly erotic to just  _ let go _ and allow Hux to be in charge, but the way self-contained, commanding Hux falls apart beneath his touch is, at times, even more thrilling.

 

He turns his attention back to working Hux open, dragging his tongue up the length of Hux’s cleft, leaving his entrance wet for the finger that works itself in. Hux is hot and tight, unused to this, and the way he clenches and relaxes around him makes Ren’s cock jump. 

 

“Ren,” Hux moans, giving up all pretense of his typically collected self.  It’s almost too much and he realizes with mild embarrassment that it isn’t even the sensation himself driving him so much as the thought of Ren watching him like this-- engaging in the vulgar sight of his own finger bringing Hux off.

 

“You’re naughty,” he scolds him, and then immediately wants to bury his face in the cool sheets in helpless humiliation at the words.  Ren has stolen his filter, his calm, his self-control.  Stolen them and replaced them with such wanting that he feels he might die of this careful teasing.  All to his own wicked plan, no doubt.

 

Ren smoothes his hand along Hux’s thigh, the other hand opening to receive the tube of lubricant that zips from the nightstand. He thumbs it open, squeezes some into his palm, and drops it on the bed. He withdraws the finger currently holding Hux open, then replaces it with two, slicked and warm. He leans down over Hux as he works him open on those fingers, scissoring them to stretch, impatient to be inside him. 

 

“I’m yours,” he purrs in Hux’s ear. “Finally. Only yours.” 

 

The stretch is so good that he loses himself in it, shuddering at each internal caress.  Ren’s words echo in his ears, feeding the sweet agony within him.  He needs Ren  _ there _ , buried deep and burning from the inside out.  He needs the promise sealed between them with that first thrust; their first together without the weight of the universe on their shoulders.

 

Unable to speak he reaches back for Ren, connecting briefly with his torso, his arm, hoping that his frantic gesture conveys what words fall short of.

 

Ren growls, sensing Hux’s urgency, draws his fingers out and slides them down his own cock, trailing the slick. He fumbles more lubricant from the tube, then presses the tip of his cock against Hux’s entrance. Hux is probably not stretched enough for it to be comfortable as he slides in, but Ren goes slow, guiding himself inside inch by inch, biting his own lip against the strain of self-control. 

 

When he bottoms out, heavy balls brushing against Hux’s, he nuzzles against Hux’s neck, already feeling the sweat of strain beginning to bead there. His tongue flicks out, licking at it. 

 

“Mine,” he whispers in Hux’s ear.

 

It’s the most pleasurable pain he’s ever endured, that first slow slide, and he groans into it without a care for how he sounds.  The press of solid thighs against his, a panting chest at his back, beloved lips at his ear, telling him the only thing he believes to be a constant in the chaos of their new lives.  

 

“Yes,” he hisses, closing his eyes and squeezing Ren tight on the inside.  “Yes, oh gods, I’m yours.”

 

His dripping cock aches for stimulation but he fights the urge to reach a hand back for himself and grits his teeth with his palms pushed flat to the bed.

 

Ren groans, a low rumbling deep in his belly, lips pressed against Hux’s neck. He slides one arm around Hux’s waist, runs his hand along the flat plane of his belly, teasing the soft ginger hair and caressing the skin near the base of his cock, but not taking him in hand. Not yet. He gives Hux a few moments to adjust to being filled, then begins to move in shallow, achingly slow thrusts. 

 

“Oh,” Hux whispers, breathless but filled with the urge to shout.  He has been taken by Ren before but never in this way, with this slow building passion.  The hysterical thought that a man could get used to this rises with a laugh in his throat and he huffs between his teeth, squeezing Ren again as his body tenses.

 

The brush of Ren’s fingers across his stomach send a pleasant electricity through his limbs.  

 

“Touch me,” he begs.

 

Ren nips at the shell of Hux’s ear, traces it with his tongue. “Needy,” he breathes, teasing Hux’s cock with one thumb, tracing its length from the base to the velvet soft tip. It twitches at the touch, but Ren doesn’t offer him more than that, yet. He needs to savor, to possess. 

 

Rolling his hips back, Ren exposes more of his own slick cock to the comparatively cool air of their dwelling, then snaps his hips forward again, making Hux cry out and forcing him to clench the blankets to keep from collapsing forward. Ren sets a pace then, now that Hux is open around him, able to take him. 

 

It’s all Hux can do to ride out the incredible sensation as Ren pumps his hips as though he’s making up for all those weeks of tension and uncertainty.  He feels as though he’s been waiting for this-- for the dam to break.  And still it’s overwhelming in the sweetest way it could be.  The taunting caress of his desperate cock only heightens his sensitivity until he’s begging with sounds when coherent words won’t come.  

 

He pushes into each thrust, taking Ren in his entirety and closing his eyes each time the spot inside him sings with pleasure.

 

Ren feels Hux’s climax mounting, knowing he’s driving him irrevocably toward the edge, and he forces himself to slow, stilling inside him as he pants against Hux’s shoulder. Slowly, he draws out, hearing Hux make an undignified whine of confusion, looking back at him over his shoulder, face flushed and hair in alluring disarray. 

 

Ren smirks at him, re-positioning himself on the bed, seated with his back to the headboard. “Come here,” he tells Hux, taking Hux’s arm and guiding him into his lap. 

 

He doesn’t need to offer any further instructions, simply holding himself steady as Hux sinks down onto his cock again. 

 

Though he’s prepared for the stretch, as soon as he’s fully seated with Ren buried to the hilt within him he gasps.  He throws loose arms around his neck and surges up for a kiss.  As he rocks forward he slides a little up the shaft and works himself with shallow thrusts only halfway down for the purpose of teasing Ren a little in return.  They exchange hungry kisses before Hux leans in again so that the only the tip of Ren’s cock remains inside him.

 

“It’s what you deserve, Pet,” he murmurs, hoping a little playful taunting will push Ren even further towards the edge.  He squeezes the head leaking inside him and wiggles a little, taking it as far as he dares.

 

Ren lets his head fall back against the headboard, biting his lip against an indulgent smile, one hand snaking around to grip the soft flesh of Hux’s ass, squeezing. He tries to allow Hux his illusion of control, for willingly giving it up has always been the pinnacle of what turns Ren on when they are together in the bedroom. But he is too far gone for games. 

 

The hand on Hux’s ass slides up his back, palm molding around Hux’s neck as Ren tugs him forward, planting a humid kiss on Hux’s lips. “Quit playing,” he says, “and fuck me.”

 

“As my prince commands,” Hux says, laughing into the kiss and catching Ren’s lower lip in his teeth before giving him what he wants.  They grind against one another, Hux panting with the effort and then burying his face in Ren’s neck, tasting salt there and tickling the sensitive spot with his beard the way Ren loves.

 

“Going to fuck you this hard every night,” he promises, each word hard won between thrusts, and then flushes despite himself, almost embarrassed by the desperate little grunts Ren pulls from him.

 

Ren growls. “Every night?” he rasps in Hux’s ear, his voice breathy, catching as Hux sinks down again. Ren’s fingers tighten on the small of Hux’s back as he licks into Hux’s mouth. “For the rest of our lives?” He needs it to be true, that they will have this freedom always. 

 

“As you desire… and as I desire… for the rest of our lives.”  He rests his sweat-soaked forehead against Ren’s, wanting in that moment to push his thoughts into his lover’s head-- into his heart.  Telling Ren how wholly incapable he is of living without him would be a start but not while he’s bouncing on his cock and so damnably close to the release they both crave.  He feels the same tension building in his knight and renews his purpose.

 

“Come on, Pet,” he murmurs, his mouth crushed against Kylo’s cheek.  “Come for me.”

 

Ren comes with a shout, fingers locked on Hux’s hips tight enough to bruise, holding him down on his cock as he pulses inside him, hips moving in jagged stutters. His climax seems to go on forever, and he only barely manages to shift his hand to grasp Hux’s cock, muttering  _ “Please.” _ Wanting Hux to come with him, to ride this same wave, reaching out desperately with his mind to sense it.

 

Whether from the passion of Ren’s plea, the powerful rush of his ejaculation, the blessed stimulation to his oversensitive cock, or some magic combination of the three he joins his partner in orgasm.  All at once he’s rocking in arms that hug him so tightly that he feels as though nothing else in the galaxy can touch him so long as Ren’s holding him.  He rests his head against a broad shoulder, coming slowly back to himself with a sigh.

 

“I love you,” he murmurs, irritated by how short the words fall of his goal-- by how inadequate they are for the task.

 

Ren buries his face in Hux’s neck, nose rubbing against the sweat-damp hairline, inhaling Hux’s scent - that familiar scent that arouses something protective and animal in his soul. Ren holds him close, the grip that was just seconds before forceful now gentle, fingers tracing slowly up the outline of Hux’s spine. 

 

“I love you too,” he whispers. “And we’re free.”

 

There’s no hiding the exhausted and unguarded grin that creeps over Hux’s face.  Nothing for it but to twine Ren’s hair in his fingers again, stroking the silken length and brushing it back from Ren’s temples.  After a moment of thought he reaches for the comb.

 

Braiding Ren’s hair in the evening is a small ritual that gives Hux an almost embarrassing amount of pleasure.  The carved wooden comb in always within reach of the bed and Hux could easily spend hours brushing the soft locks that tumble over Ren’s shoulders; massaging his scalp as he works out the tangles.  When it’s smooth and shining he uses the comb to help weave a tight braid from the crown of his head to finish just below the nape of his neck.

 

“It will keep your hair from tangling at night,” he once told Ren, but he suspects his knight would let him do it regardless of any benefits.  Now he plaits Ren’s still wet hair with deft fingers, using the comb to guide each strand into place.

 

“Isn’t it strange… when I began courting you I saw so many obstacles in our future.  But now that we share everything it feels as though we’ve had what we needed all along.”  He glances over at the plant in one corner where a narrow shaft of light comes into their dwelling; his first gift to Ren, and an absurd endeavor to keep alive in this place devoid of green.  They nurture it nonetheless.    

 

As though sensing what Hux is thinking-- and in all probability he is-- Ren reaches up to take Hux’s hand, paying no mind to the half-finished braid.  

 

“Flowers in a desert,” he says simply, squeezing Hux’s fingers so that he understands.

 

He does.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking with us. Your support is everything <3


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